One of the tough things about keeping up a site that catalogues the weird little quirks of Japan, is that the longer you live here, the more the weird becomes normal. Living here 5 going on 6 years, I don't even bat an eye anymore at grandmothers with rainbow-colored hair, old men in dresses, festivals that worship the penis, et al. It's just...Japan. But on the other hand, the closer I get to Japan being normal, the further I get from my home of America being normal. So now Japanese people can point out things about my homeland that they don't get, and I can understand where they're coming from somewhat. I'm not sure if America will ever reach the levels of eyebrow-raising hijinks that Japan does...but not for the lack of trying.
This is not the main thing I want to get at in this post (although it will become relevant later), but many Japanese people wonder why Americans are unable to slurp noodles. I, like most Americans I imagine, was raised on the belief that slurping or otherwise making loud sounds when you eat is fairly rude. When eating ramen, or udon/soba if it actually had a taste, I gradually bring the noodless into my mouth, soundlessly, and then chew on them. This FASCINATES Japanese people, who slurp on noodles like there is no tomorrow. Apparently, you are unable to "fully enjoy the taste of the noodle" unless you slurp it. I've asked for some sort of scientific backing of this claim, but have yet to get any. Japanese people have actually requested that I slurp noodles, and I just have the complete inability to do so, which also blows their mind. Its almost like I've said "I'm 30 years old and never experienced orgasm", as if slurping in your noodles instead of chewing them brings your taste buds one step closer to orgasmic joy or something. You may think I'm exaggerating, but go ask the nearest Japanese person about their feelings on slurping noodles and see what happens. You may want to keep a raincoat or plastic tarp handy, just in case.
Which brings me to this; last week, a random Japanese guy asked me a question I honestly couldn't answer: why do American women in porn make that sucking-in air noise?
You know what I'm talking about. Go fire up an American porn and listen for it. "Oh yeah baby....SUUUUUUU...oh that feels good...SUUUUUU...yeah, right there...SUUUUUUU!"
I don't know if this sound has always been present in porn and I just never noticed it, or if its a new invention. I'm not sure who decided that women making vacuum-cleaner noises would be sexy in porn...but there are a lot of un-sexy things in porn, it feels kind of pointless to focus on just one.
Anyway, a Japanese guy asked me this, and I simply had no answer for him. He then asked if it was limited to porn; do American women make this sound in real life as well? Unfortunately, I couldn't answer this question eithers. It's been a LONG time since I've been with a non-Asian woman, and quite frankly I've forgotten what its like (*insert some sort of teardrop smiley emoticon here*). This isn't a result of some crazed Yellow Fever binge - I tried to find foreign women, but couldn't, or they were just too difficult to deal with.
Anyway, yeah, the sucking-in air noise. I don't get it. This is something my wife had also noticed when we watched some American porns together. Having been asked about it, I mentioned it casually to her upon coming home. She then hit me with this, and I don't think I've actually stopped laughing since -
"Yeah, that sucking-in air noise! I have a new theory about that. I have a feeling that, during sex, that noise is natural, and this is why Americans can't slurp ramen or other noodles. If women make the slurping noise, it reminds them too much of what they sound like during sex, so they become embarrased. If guys make the slurping noise, then he'll sound like a woman having sex, so he can't do it either. Yeah, I think I figured it out..."
I regained my composure long enough to ask her if the sucking in noise was "natural", she said - "Well, you know, every race has their own unique noise. For us Japanese women, its crying like babies. For American women, it must be that sucking-in noise. I don't know about other women though. Hey! Maybe you can go out there and do a survey or something!"
At this point, I asked - "Does this mean I have permission to have sex with girls from multiple nationalities?"
Her reponse - "No! Just find them, and ask them what noises they make during sex."
Yeah, I'm sure that will be an excellent conversation piece. "Hi! Where are you from? How long have you been in Japan? During sex, do you find your screams of passion to resemble the sound of a 14.4k modem, or the sound you make when eating fried chicken off the bone?"
So my fellow Americans, the next time you go to a ramen/noodle place, do the wonderful sounds of noodle slurping remind you of hot, sweaty sex? If it didn't before, will it now?
Its these little things that help us to understand our cultures better.
so you actually watch porn with your wife still on a regular basis? Nice, signs of a healthy relationship. But you still haven't addressed the baby questions yet. Your fans want to know.
lol, I love this blog. -muzras
Given the staggering amount of weird fetishes out there, the 14.4k modem one doesn't sound too off the wall. All the kids who grew up sneaking internet porn on dial-up can relate. Now if there was a way to make the modem-screamer look pixelated, it'd be a home run.
I do not make any 'sucking air' noise during sex. I asked my husband, he confirms, I don't make any sound that could be described thus.
I'm the first at something.....finally...Oh wait=[
*goes to corner, hugs knees, and cries*
Well,nice to see your back. I never thought, I would think about sex while eating noodles.
Thanks a lot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id6rsIAe-gg
i think this video from youtube (although from korea) shows you why the slurping is like ya know.. head
Is it just me, or is the crying like babies thing a complete turnoff?
Huh, I always figured the whole slurping noodles thing was just an anime thing, I didn't know people actually did it. Yeah I don't think I can ever slurp them. Due to my dad, uh, being very strict, I cannot make any noises when eating that are not "Please pass the salt. Thank you."
On that note, I now know to make sure to never ever ever let him near an authentic Japanese resteraunt where authentic Japanese people are eating noodles. I'm pretty sure he'd murder everyone in a 30 mile radius.
Mmh, maybe it's a turn-on for guys with an inferiority complex. Well, you get the picture
I dunno, it seems like to me the ameru-can chicks are making more child-birth labor noises. (from big black cock)
I hate German porn partially for the sounds they make while they try to be sexy, "ja-ja-ja-ja-ja-ja" then a deep guttural orgasm sound that seems like it should come from a new born down syndrome calf.
I love how Japanese compares acting to real life.
But to play along: ask them if Japanese screams like babies when pounded in (say) their stomach by (say) a fist.
Generally, that's what the actresses are mimicking. Pain from a big, juicy, ravaging cock.
Half pain, half pleasure, full excitement.
Also, tell your friend to stop base his comparisions off of porn.
My theory for the suuuu.
When you take a massive/impressive/stimulating member your reflex is to gasp or cry out in pleasure, but you don't want to actually gasp or cry out otherwise you might get dizzy from over oxygenation of your blood or seem weird, so you regulate the gasp by closing your mouth, possible biting your lip. A side effect of doing that is the sound of air rusing past your lips into your lungs.
Can't really speak for the Country, but New Zealand's more of a grunt/groan place insofar as my experiences take me. No especially wierd noises. Sorry.
Glad to see you're still back on track, man. I gotta agree with Phil, though, that crying shit sounds seriously nasty.
Hahaha, the sucking in noise in porn and real life is sometimes the sound of trying to withhold orgasm, or the sound of a sudden heightened sexual response, or just basically any reluctant-ish response to a sudden sexual response. As far as I know [American] guys make it, too.
To me, it sounds nothing like slurping, though! Chinese people are anti-slurping as well, but they make that sucking in noise all the time, sex or no sex. Really, a sudden sharp intake of breath... Like when something extremely awful happens and you don't want to believe it but you KNOW it's true. (Read: when it comes to sex it is more like, "Oh damn, this cannot be real, no it can't, please let it be real, but dude, I just CAN'T believe it!")
But feeling closer to orgasm isn't awful (with woman parts, though, it can be kind of awful/painful when your body feels it before your mind does), and only babies naturally cry like babies. Every culture to its own consquences.
Slurping noodles also brings in air, helping to cool them before you scorch your mouth.
As a control, you should watch a foreign porn star in a US porn movie and see if they make the sound. Do women make the sound in European porn?
The only time Ive heard that slurping sound in porn is when they do oral. Most likely, they exaggerate the sound to make sure guys know whats happening. Otherwise, it may well be possible to completely overlook the action?
It's true; slurping noodles does make them taste better! I was raised in the no-slurp American culture like yourself, Az, so maybe it's just that I find the practice satisfyingly rebellious...
I have never made a noodle-slurping, air-sucking-in sound in the bedroom, though. :/
Hey Az, you're back at your best!!
I fully understand how you can grow too accustomed to the weirdness to notice anymore. That apparently you became a true salaryman also made me worry a bit about the future of your blog, but obviously you can still pull off a great post - keep them coming!
In contrast, I never got why Japanese AV actresses HAVE to cry in porn. Either they're told to do it or they're crying because of the disappointment but it's such a big turn off I actually try to find porn where they do NOT cry in it.
Since Japanese reality TV is filled with Japanese people crying because food is so delicious, maybe they are on to something with slurping maximizing flavor....
I've heard that actresses in Japanese AV lose their voices sometimes...
I think the screaming has more to do with the intensity of the orgasms some Japanese women get, which from my experience seems to be much more intense than women back home. With that in mind, I find it arousing.
Oh and I always thought the slurping served a practical purpose of cooling down the noodles just enough to eat them quickly. Next time you eat ramen, watch how the loudest people finish the quickest.
I agree, the baby crying sounds are quite the turn-off, which is one reason I've stayed away from Japanese porn. But on that note, what's the update on censorship over there? Are they being more lenient with it? And how do you watch porn over there? Do they filter your internet or can you watch American porn? Your fans, OK maybe just me, are dying to know! :)
I've never watched American porn :x
Breathing is generally a natural part of the enjoying yourself during sex process, though the "sucking air in" noise... I don't know. It could just be a porn thing, as none of my non-asian ex girlfriends did that.
However, my filipina ex, vietnamese-american (born in LA, fully americanized, never left) ex, and my current chinese girlfriend all do/did the little girl squeak (no crying though, thank Jesus)... though with the right position, those squeaks are replaced by moans, and later caucasian-esque screams.
I don't know why...just offering more data points.
Well as for the slurping of noodles, I can't slurp. My mom took care of that while I was growing up.
As for the weird sucking noises during sex. I know I don't make such weird noises. According to my fiance I'm a moaner and compares my breathing to the type of heavy breathing you hear in scary movies when the antagonist is on the phone with the protagonist.....gee thanks honey for that wonderful analogy.
hmmm, I suppose field trials will be in order then, at least for those of us free-range... maybe explain it to the wife like ken-do... you are supposed to put your spirit into it, and that means loud.
For the record, my Nana would never be amused at any sound made at table, and woe to them that offended her sensibilities. But, when in Japan, try and do as they do. I don't slurp ramen because I have a beard, which which is hard enough to keep dry with ramen noodles as it is.
Hmmm, I suppose Japanese women wouldn't like the beard anyway, so I have no chance there, ne?
similar to what doktor said, It's a reaction to pain/pleasure. It's like the joke from family guy when Peter hits his knee.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFxP-G5w2cs
Dude, here is where your random Japanese guy is wrong. The "suuuu" noise is strictly from porn in origin. I'm no man-whore...well not anymore at least, but I have been with women from all over the world. Aside from Japanese women who actually do sound like squeek toys during sex, most, if not all of the other women I've been with have their own sounds. However, I do believe that each culture/nationality has their own porn sounds as well. For example, Hispanic cultures have the "ay" sex sound, Germans have the "ja" sound Scandinavian cultures have the "aahhh" sound etc. Personally the American "suuuu" sound doesn't do much for me. Its actually more of a turn off. I don't mean to sound like a porn phrophet or anything, this is just my opinion.
I once did a girl who sounded like a seagull, but I don't think it was based on nationality (more of an individual touch I guess).
I think the reason for the vacuum noise in porn is that they're trying to emphasize that they're breathing heavily...like "ooh ahh that's so good you're giving me an asthma attack"
Your wife is hilarious. You should ask her if she wants to write an update.
Your wife is hilarious. You should ask her if she wants to write an update.
I dunno, I make a kind of "ahuuuaauurrr, aaaa" noise when I'm gettin' it (male). I can't be more specific without using the IPA.
This comment post should become the ultimate collection point for "noises people make during sex". We can make a graph, guys!
will your vid was great, and i seem to be able to manage to slurp... but the hot soup burns my lips and its hard to continue...
PINRL. Porn is not real life. It's an important point to keep in mind. Porn is acting that's intended to get guys off. I suppose somewhere someone got the idea that women who act as if they can barely contain themselves during sex, in a mixture of pain and pleasure, is a turn-on for guys. I have no idea how that's true in general terms. Speaking from personal experience, it's mostly annoying. It sounds fake, in my opinion.
Slurping noodles. What's good manners in one culture may well be bad manners in another. In Germany there's a saying, "Warum rülpset und pfurzet ihr nicht, hat es euch nicht geschmacket?" Which translates to "why aren't you burping and farting, didn't it taste well?" Not to say that Germans fart at the table, but that the idea that someone might fart isn't necessarily a sign of ill manners. Ditto slurping noodles. When in Rome... when in Japan, slurp the noodles. In America, not so much.
isn't the slurping just to cool down the noodles and broth? i mean keeping the whole bowl as hot as possible keeps the meal fresh over the course of the meal, and then u cool down the bite you're taking by sucking air past it, instead of blowing on it like in the west. but slurping splashes soup all over your face(and beard) so the west including not slurping into table manners as a form of hygiene, right? ok there's the hypothesis, someone go do some science.
and about noises in porn, chicken/egg question. does the majority of society effect how porn sounds or does porn skew the way people behave during normal sex?
You know Japanese guys make the slurping sound in porn. Whenever they eat or suck anything it sounds like a Shop Vac sucking up chunky jello.
Your wife is AWESOME. It's so great to see that there are some Japanese people who actually have personality...
I agree with the Japanese. Noodles are 1000 times better when you slurp them. I always have since my dad was never strict about table manners, and can't even comprehend being unable to.
I'm a bonafide American woman (and white, to boot!) and I don't make that noise. That noise is just for porn "actresses." Love Japanese noodles though. And no, I don't slurp 'em.
"Its these little things that help us to understand our cultures better."
OR drive us that much closer to insanity, eh? ^_-
I don't know about the other ladies here, but I've never made that noise. And, when I DO actually watch porn, I have come to the conclusion that that noise sounds hella fake. It doesn't sound natural-- in the case of both Western porn and Japanese porn. I can't believe that a man would think that those sounds are in any way real.
Also, I can suck the noodle the way it's meant to be done, and I get the weirdest pseudo compliments on my "Japaneseness" for it. Strange. So, I guess that's two social assumptions broken right there.
And when you do finally come around to slurping your noodles, not only can you not go back (welcome home) but the Japanese don't seem to have the common, rewarding response of "Oh sh*t! It's a gaijin doing normal Japanese things!"
I can't remember an American woman ever making that sucking noise during sex. Fortunately, none of the Japanese women I've slept with have ever made that crying noise, either. When they do that in porn it just ruins it for me - it sounds like they are really not enjoying it.
I had one Chinese woman who kept yelling "tian na" over and over.
Wow, I never noticed the SUUU before... now it's all I can pay attention to. Now watching American porn will never be the same...
hmmm... and may i ask what western porn title you might suggest, so we can study this phenomenon? Just for research purposes and all that, of course ;).
Must be habit picked up by porn workers that gets passed on unintentionally.
Many noises are indeed fake, exaggerated by porn actor/actresses, some directors have a strong dislike for them too.
There is a very interesting ask/tell thread on somethingawful with a good director who works in porn answering various questions about the industry, the noises thing was a common question.
http://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=2858945&pagenumber=35#lastpost
Slurping Noodles is like those guys who taste wine, or coffee for a living . . . apparently it "aerates" the liquid so that the aroma part of the flavour is enhanced, or summat like that, but how that applies to porn have no idea . . .
This is pretty funny. I don't think I'll eat noodles at work for a while.
crying like babies! it all makes sense now...
Ha ha ha... I don't even watch porn and I still know exactly what you're talking about! From the few I looked at as a curious teenager/links from guys online. Porn in general makes me assume a rather confused-child expression (oh god the surgery scars... oh god they're fucking and she's not even wet... what are those spots on her butt? why is her skin so wrinkly?) and that SUUUUU thing reminds me of all of that at once.
I pasted some of this to a friend, and he said "I think they breath with their teeth closed because they're trying to act like oh god it's so good I'm gritting my teeth". Sounds pretty accurate, if you want to be boring. It just looks stupid and fake to me.