Before actually coming here, anyone I talked to regarding my plans to live in Japan invariably responded with "I bet you're going to get married over there." As if this was some immutable rule of the cosmos or something. "Gravity pulls things down; space is really cold; and Az will get married to a Japanese girl in Japan." Even my own parents got in on it, with my Mom predicting that I would give her cute little half-Japanese grandchildren in the future.
Leave it to me to go and prove them right.
However, thinking back on it, what did that say about me - that I was going to be an irresistible chick magnet to the Japanese, or that the people who knew me had no confidence in me succeeding with an American girl? What's up with that, anyway?
I will admit though, a certain part of me also hoped this would be the case. Though I have since fully recovered...yes...at the time, I did have Yellow Fever.* It wasn't a terrible strain as I've seen in some of my other fellow men, but it was a fairly strong outbreak. Looking back at my porn collection of that time is downright embarrassing. "Why the hell did I download this? Just because the girl is Asian? She looks like a 13-year old boy and...why is she crying?! This isn't even remotely sexy!"
*For those not in the know, "Yellow Fever" refers to the phenomenon of non-Asian men only having an interest in Asian women. Yellow Fever is particularly strong among white males, but black, Hispanic, and men of other nationalities have been documented with the affliction.
Why does Yellow Fever happen anyway? See, these are the kinds of questions I want those government-funded studies to answer. I don't give a shit if rats can count up to four or if a duck can learn his own name - these are the pressing questions our society needs answers to. The interesting thing about Yellow Fever is that not only is it about unnaturally loving Asian women, it also includes a case of actively disregarding non-Asian women. And that's just bizarre.
I can only assume that it's something that develops from early childhood. In video games, we got Chun-Li, a strong female fighter who kicked really high and gave us plenty of up-skirt panty shots. On the other hand, we also got Princess Peach, who put Mario through hell - poor guy had to fight evil turtles and mushrooms and shit, jump over blazing lava pits and dodge falling rocks and ghosts and fucking cannonballs, and after all that, he finally gets to the Princess and she rewards all that hard work with a kiss on his cheek. Oh hell no. If I'm gonna be jumping over fire pits and shit to save your ass, some panties better be dropping. It's called gratitude honey, learn it.
I believe this sort of thing started to condition us at an early age. Asian women like Chun-Li are strong and independent - she doesn't need your help. Also, she has thick thighs and isn't afraid of showing you her panties, which is never a bad thing. American women like Princess Peach are difficult and needy, and ultimately ungrateful even if you do jump through all their hoops. ...To all the women in the audience ready to lynch me right now, I'm just saying, I think this is the message that we poor men were bombarded with when we were kids.
At any rate, I'm cured of my Yellow Fever. At one point, I actively disliked Japanese women in general (I'm sure this shows in some of my earlier work). I think that's a common response for those who idealize something, and then come to find that the reality is far from the ideal. Every Japanese woman who walked around with a hairstyle 3x bigger than her head, a face so caked in makeup you could scrape it off and use it to mortar a house, carrying some ridiculously expensive designer bag that you know she had some guy buy for her, and with a screeching laugh complete with hearty gasps of breath between each wail that makes one just want to rip their own ears off and throw them at her - these women only served to fuel my fires of hatred and contempt. And they were always plenty to be found. During this time, I would have loved to have dated any woman who wasn't Japanese. The only problem was actually finding them, and then finding one who didn't want to sit back and let the man do all the work in pursuing her.
It was near the end of my Japanese-female-hating ways that I met my wife. I was coming out of the miserable funk anyway, but she just happened to be a girl who didn't have the big hair and 3-hours worth of makeup, she had no designer bags, and her laugh actually made me smile too, instead of wanting to massacre kittens. During my time dating her, I found her to be a wonderful young woman who I knew I could rely on - she just happened to be Japanese.
After dating for two and a half years, living together for a year and a half, I proposed to her on Christmas. I had been thinking about a two or three year engagement. She, however, had different plans. "How about May?" she asks. ...May?! That was only 5 months down the line! I managed to talk her into September, which still wasn't the two or three years I'd envisioned, but I figured 9 months would be more than enough time to prepare.
Silly me, I didn't realize just how short 9 months actually are.
As for actually getting married, we actually did that in March. I think I explained this before, but the wife said that we should go ahead and turn in the paperwork. I suggested that we wait until the actual marriage ceremony, but she had her heart set on doing it now. And there was no argument that I could make that she wouldn't hear as "I'm having second thoughts." There really was no reason to wait it out, so we turned in the paperwork and were legally married in March.
So, I'd fulfilled my prophecy. I'd gotten married to a Japanese girl. Personally though, I rarely ever think of it as an "international marriage". When we first started dating, I used to say things like "Well, Americans are like this..." and "Japanese people may do that...". She would point out however that I usually hated getting stereotyped/generalized in other aspects (such as "all Americans own guns" or "all black people like rap"), and as I would say "everyone is different", why can't that apply to relationships as well? So I'm me, she's her, and whatever strengths or weaknesses we have in this relationship, it's not as an American and a Japanese, but as Azrael and Mrs. Azrael. I think things work better that way.
...That having been said, there are still some areas where I have to un-Japanese her. For example, she watches Japanese TV and actually enjoys it. I'll fix her yet.
Thank you very much for your continued support and donations! It is very much appreciated and of a tremendous help to me!
For all those who are interested/have been asking: Wedding Pictures. Be nice...
For donations, please paypal to azrael@outpostnine.com. There is also a direct link on the Outpost Nine homepage.
What do you mean, "Be Nice". Those are great pictures! You look very happy...Good stuff.
lol why do i cried
What beautiful pictures! I wish you two the best!
Uh... don't know if you are aware of it, but you have also released all the photos on your album to the public; from work to graduation, etc etc...
just a heads up, dunno if u meant to share all those to the general public :[
(Az's Note: Yeah, I know...Photobucket was just the easiest choice.)
Her dress is gorgeous, she is gorgeous, the venue is gorgeous. Good choices all around man.
I wish you both the best, and please pass on our congratulations and praise to your wife.
great pics Az!
For all the years I've been reading OP9 & GS, this may be my only comment ever...
But congrats man, and from one random stranger you'll never meet - I gotta say, I think you two make a damn good couple. Best of luck to you both, and no matter what you wind up doing down the road, I hope you keep writing!
Wow Az, you two just look amazing. It's great to see you genuinely happy in those pictures. But I think you forgot one important factor when explaining the difference between finding a japanese woman and a non asian woman...
No matter the culture, you have to go through a lot of bad choices, before you find the one that's perfect for you. You certainly found one that makes you happy, and set the perfect example that no matter what culture, geography, or difference in super powers, there is always a chance to find the right one. Congratulations. I only wish I could actually be your friend irl and be able to tell you that.
By the way, in the course of stalking...I mean, browsing through your photo collection, there's something that struck me as odd. You don't like look anything like what you're writing suggests. Here I was expecting this really tough/snarky/sarcastic looking guy, but you appear to have this perpetually innocent/teddy bear look.....haha, just my opinion.
the wedding pict- WOOOOT !!
i see there was a gaijin priest, did he talk gaijinese during the ceremony ?
Wow Az, you two just look amazing. It's great to see you genuinely happy in those pictures. But I think you forgot one important factor when explaining the difference between finding a japanese woman and a non asian woman...
No matter the culture, you have to go through a lot of bad choices, before you find the one that's perfect for you. You certainly found one that makes you happy, and set the perfect example that no matter what culture, geography, or difference in super powers, there is always a chance to find the right one. Congratulations. I only wish I could actually be your friend irl and be able to tell you that.
Wow, beautiful pictures. It's amazing the course you've taken - from the very beginning up until now. Good luck with everything, and enjoy everything. Your pictures remind me that sometimes good things can happen and people can be genuine. Congratulations!
Hey Az, I've been reading for 3 years or so, never decided to comment before. Just wanted to say I really liked your wedding pictures, I couldn't stop smiling at my screen like some idiot. Congratulations man.
Haa... Yes, Yellow Fever... I totally agree.
And when you date a japanese girl who show you how much you idealized japanese girls...
Damn, so much pain........
Now you have to help me : how do you finish your "Japanese-female-hating ways"..?
There are some really awesome pictures! The photographer is totaly worth his pay. And finally i got to see Mrs. Azrael. :)
Wow I actually thought that you were giving the fist to the priest. You look really tense in all those pictures by the way, I guess its the wedding effect.
1) Once again, I am the Odd Man Out -- I've yet to
suffer the ravages of Yellow Fever (and now that I
have a GF, I probably never will...).
2) Was the wedding in an actual church? When the
GF and I went to Tokyo Disneyland after the 2007
World SF Convention, the hotel we stayed in had a
full-sized chapel-esque thing in the lobby which
looked very much like what's seen in your pics.
Congratulations Az. I'm very happy that you were able to find happiness, especially after all the things that have happened to you in the past. I recently lost my own fiance, and have been going through a horrible time because of it. Seeing that you've found a wonderful person to spend your life with gives me hope for myself. I wish you all the best on your journey with your wife.
P.S. Those pictures are wonderful. You two are an adorable couple.
As someone who's gone through yellow fever (still is) i can say you've explained it perfectly. The Disregard for non-asian women is very true but also very inconvenient unless you're actually in japan.
ご結婚おめでとう！
Wonderful pics. Thanks for sharing them!
Hey, Az, would you ever consider writing a post on your Japanese studying methods? For those readers who are at that tricky, "JLPT2-ish" intermediate level where you can't ignore the masses of kanji and obscure grammar anymore.
ヒントいただきたいけどな。
Well, just an idea. Again, congratulations. Looking forward to the (apparently swiftly forthcoming) baby pics in the future ... :p
Has she taken your last name, or added it to her own? Or does it work completely different in Japan?
Be nice? Ah don't be silly, you both look great. And congratulations.
Have read your blog since OP9 and I have always loved it. I have never commented before but I would like to congratulate you and say that your wife is beautiful. Hope you two have a long and wonderful life.
/Lord Gus in Sweden.
Glad to have been of help with the Wedding Photo bribery!
Az, thanks for posting the pics. I've never posted before and probably never will again, but I wanted to say I'm happy for you and wish you success and happiness. God bless you and your family.
ur wfie is hot
Just kidding, congrats man.
You didn't tell us you were marrying Lucy Liu!
I love the pic where you can see the minister in the background bowing as you are walking out.
That's actually pretty cool! Great pics!
Oh, wow... what a dress! You guys look so happy
:)
Bravo sir. I've been married for about a year and a half myself now, and I will say she is quite the lovely girl. Good luck, and please as always keep updating. Always funny, and wonderful to read.
-Philip
Jeff, Congrats man.
The misses is cute too! The be nice I don't think was necessary.. I think you two are a beautiful couple and that was a beautiful wedding.
I've been following your life for 2 2 1/2 years now from when these stories were on OP9.
God, It's been tough keeping up with your story as you haven't been chronologically correct But at least as of lately we're within a few months huh?
Well dude, I like many of your friends, family and GS readers can't wait to see the halflings!
Have fun knocking up your wife!!!
muwa hahahahahahaha
Az! These are amazing! Beautiful wedding!! I wish you guys the best in the future. I wish I could donate, but as a poor student...
Hopefully things look up soon!
You bastard! You made me cry. How beautiful! You both look like royalty. The venue was just beautiful. She looks lovely and good - yeah, I remember the stories about that time of the month - but, man, you guys just look great and very, very happy. You make me want to get married in a tux! Of course, it made me want to see the after-wedding party pictures, but this'll do. :-)
Congratulations! I'm very happy for you.
I went back the other day and re-read your entry about when you went out on your second date wtih your future wife and you ran into some of your students on the bus. Very funny! Now I can really picture it. She's just as cute as your students said she was.
Also, I'll send you a small wedding present via paypal. Best wishes and do your best!
Longtime lurker, first time commenter.
You guys look happy. She's hot and you remind me of a bigger Chris Tucker.
Congrats.
Nice wedding pics man. I feel bad because I didn't contribute anything. I bet that cut you down a few million Yen. I almost thought you'd be doing it Japanese style, but then I forgot the whole romantic idea of the woman getting married in a church that has Japanese women fascinated.
As far as Yellow Fever goes, I figured it to be an unknown fascination with something that one's own society creates through a small, concentrated bombardment of culture bits through the media. Like anime, sushi, chopsticks, kimono, samurai, etc. Then we go over to Japan and are totally disillusioned and resentful that they didn't match what we were led to believe. It's pretty much with Japanese and the church marryings or with hip hop over there.
Asian girls - without the crazy hair and ridiculous makeup - can be gorgeous. But then so can *any* girl. Confound the people who have accused me of yellow fever, how do they explain all the American and European girls I have fallen for? I am very much an equal opportunity sort of guy.
That aside, wedding pictures = d'awwwwwwww.
Same here. First comment for all the years: Congrats, Az!
*does not suffer from Yellow fever, being Asian himself* Ha!
hiya az....been reading for months now (haven't gotten to outpostnine yet though), my first comment...and so...
so far i love your blog about japan. as many others here, i hope one day to do the jet thing. i have enjoyed every little bit....even the horrid job episodes. you have our support over here in the states. good luck on getting a new and better job, good luck with your wife (nice pics, been waiting for those!), and pop out some babies already! ganbate!
also i must admit, i am one of those white guys who experiences (minor) episodes of Yellow Fever.
Azrael-san, you have helped inspire me to further my goals of graduating from college (took several years off) and doing what i can to get into jet in the future. ARIGATO GOZAIMASU!
now to have fun rummaging through ALL your photos.... heheheheh (evil silly laugh ensues)
Sincerely,
Mylhendir of North Carolina, US
That picture with your guest on the stairs watching you two up top is amazing! I can see why she couldn't wait to get married.
You made my day man! Those photo----AWESOME! Just AWESOME!
Keep up the good work my friend!
Congrats! The pics are beautiful. and your hairstyle pwnz! hehe
Yo, did you give yourself that fresh line? You said you cut your own hair. This means that either you are very precise or are a freakin' warlock with double-jointed wrists.
Thanks for sharing your wedding pictures with us. Remember to try and hold out from having kids as long as you can!
I gotta agree with Stan there, you really remind me of Chris Tucker. =) That aside, lovely wedding pictures. I especially like this one http://s4.photobucket.com/albums/y105/LordAzrael/wedding/?action=view¤t=01620022.jpg although your faces can't be seen in it. It just has such a nice warm and fuzzy, cozy feeling to it. Hope you get a good job soon before the little Azlets start being churned out. ^^
Oh by the way, all your pics are extremely open dude. Maybe you should roll out some black face bars for anonymity's sake. You can never be too safe.
Hey Az, long time reader here, since GaijinSmash was on Outpost9, just wanted to say congratulations! Also, the pictures were beautiful man, you two look great together, I'm really happy for you and Mrs Az. :)
良い写真ですね！それと彼女は美人です！
アズさんは不思議な場合が多くても運が良いですよね。
once again, おめでとう！
Looks like it was a great ceremony.
So when will "Baby Blues VII: The Awakening" come?
And will there be pictures?
And will it be followed by "Baby Blues VIII: The Gaijin Media Adventure"?
Well, you probably get enough of that from Mrs. Azrael & Co.
Best wishes from Faroe Islands
Wow. You both look amazing! I was looking forward to seeing these pictures for a while, but they definitely exceeded my expectations. Well-wishes for your marriage!
Please tell me you managed to somehow sneak "I promise to Activate your Interlock! Connect your Dynatherms! Up your Infracells in sickness and in health! And ensure your Megathrusters are Go for richer or for poorer!" into your wedding vows.
Great pictures all round!
Your wife is so cute! And she's a nice person, too? You did well, Az!