Wizdom
09-20-2005, 05:02 PM
Aint that a Bitch pt 7
Because Brutha Jay the Man, Brutha Fujin, Brutha Mushu, e-sister Shamu , Van and my ex Ahisma wants it, here's another ATAB story. (whew the list is getting long =)
*Disclaimer my dad is insane, if you hear him say BOMBA!! Run for your life. Matter of fact if you see him, run for your life.
My Crazy Dad pt 2
The Facts:
Exhibit A): My Dad thinks he knows everything about everything. I made a mistake when I was younger and ask him what did he do for a living and he replied “ Boy!! When I was your age I was a electrician, a carpenter, a painter, a mechanic, a plumber, a firemen, a taxi cab driver, and a police officer in Cuba. Now get your lazy ass up and do something!”
The funny thing is, when you ask him to fix something, he messes it up. Except for outdoors stuff. ( see ATAB pt 2)
Exhibit B): My father is as bold as a bull. I once saw my dad try to punk a cop and curse him out. But my Dad is short and stocky. He’s like Red Foxx (in Sanford and son) but twice as mean and twice as strong. Needless to say, my dad spent the night in jail (again!), but not without a fight.
http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/5122/13536reddfoxx1531web9my.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Redd Foxx in Sandford and Son
Exhibit C): My father thinks he knows everyone. He once told be he used to hangout with the wailers. ( bob Marley and the wailers).
Put it all together and you got trouble waiting to happen.
The story: One day my father found out that the Roots Reggae Band, Toots and the Maytals, were playing in our town. My father runs down to the concert hall like speedy Gonzales and some how finds out where the back entrance is. He then posts up on the wall like he owns the place and waits for Toots and the Maytals to come. When they come in, my dad doesn’t even recognize them and ask the body guard which one is Toots. My father then slips into the dressing room like he was James bond and begins bugging the hell out of Toots. Saying stuff like. “Hey MON! remember me!, me and your dad was real cool”, “ I used to watch you play in Jamaica when you was younger, like 40 years ago”.
Im sure Toots was thinking, “ who the hell is this old guy, and why would I remember his old ass 40 years ago. But Toots was cool and finally gave in and said he knew my father. My father gave him a hug and a daps and with a “IRIE!!’ my father left and went back to the concert area.
When the concert was in full swing and the music grooving and feeling good. My father Bumrush, the stage like he was a running back, then he hops on stage like he’s an Olympic high jumper and starts dancing with Toots and the band.
At this point the crowd is going wild. My dad does his half assed dance then hugs Toots again and gives him another dap. My dad stays up there for a while then when he felt satisfied he goes “IRIE” and jumps in the crowd like he’s Puff daddy.
The crowd is going bonkers at this point and all my dad friends thinks he’s the shit!. But they don’t know like I know. My dads is a Nut!
__________________________________________________ _______________
Slang dictionary
Daps: bruthas handshake
IRIE : It’s a like a battle cry. People shout it in times of positive emotions or feelings, or anything that is good. Specifically it refers to high emotions and peaceful vibrations.
Bumrush: it’s like running but your running through people and bombarding the area
Because Brutha Jay the Man, Brutha Fujin, Brutha Mushu, e-sister Shamu , Van and my ex Ahisma wants it, here's another ATAB story. (whew the list is getting long =)
*Disclaimer my dad is insane, if you hear him say BOMBA!! Run for your life. Matter of fact if you see him, run for your life.
My Crazy Dad pt 2
The Facts:
Exhibit A): My Dad thinks he knows everything about everything. I made a mistake when I was younger and ask him what did he do for a living and he replied “ Boy!! When I was your age I was a electrician, a carpenter, a painter, a mechanic, a plumber, a firemen, a taxi cab driver, and a police officer in Cuba. Now get your lazy ass up and do something!”
The funny thing is, when you ask him to fix something, he messes it up. Except for outdoors stuff. ( see ATAB pt 2)
Exhibit B): My father is as bold as a bull. I once saw my dad try to punk a cop and curse him out. But my Dad is short and stocky. He’s like Red Foxx (in Sanford and son) but twice as mean and twice as strong. Needless to say, my dad spent the night in jail (again!), but not without a fight.
http://img198.imageshack.us/img198/5122/13536reddfoxx1531web9my.jpg (http://imageshack.us)
Redd Foxx in Sandford and Son
Exhibit C): My father thinks he knows everyone. He once told be he used to hangout with the wailers. ( bob Marley and the wailers).
Put it all together and you got trouble waiting to happen.
The story: One day my father found out that the Roots Reggae Band, Toots and the Maytals, were playing in our town. My father runs down to the concert hall like speedy Gonzales and some how finds out where the back entrance is. He then posts up on the wall like he owns the place and waits for Toots and the Maytals to come. When they come in, my dad doesn’t even recognize them and ask the body guard which one is Toots. My father then slips into the dressing room like he was James bond and begins bugging the hell out of Toots. Saying stuff like. “Hey MON! remember me!, me and your dad was real cool”, “ I used to watch you play in Jamaica when you was younger, like 40 years ago”.
Im sure Toots was thinking, “ who the hell is this old guy, and why would I remember his old ass 40 years ago. But Toots was cool and finally gave in and said he knew my father. My father gave him a hug and a daps and with a “IRIE!!’ my father left and went back to the concert area.
When the concert was in full swing and the music grooving and feeling good. My father Bumrush, the stage like he was a running back, then he hops on stage like he’s an Olympic high jumper and starts dancing with Toots and the band.
At this point the crowd is going wild. My dad does his half assed dance then hugs Toots again and gives him another dap. My dad stays up there for a while then when he felt satisfied he goes “IRIE” and jumps in the crowd like he’s Puff daddy.
The crowd is going bonkers at this point and all my dad friends thinks he’s the shit!. But they don’t know like I know. My dads is a Nut!
__________________________________________________ _______________
Slang dictionary
Daps: bruthas handshake
IRIE : It’s a like a battle cry. People shout it in times of positive emotions or feelings, or anything that is good. Specifically it refers to high emotions and peaceful vibrations.
Bumrush: it’s like running but your running through people and bombarding the area