Would you ever hit your child?

[eyez0nme]

If he disrespects me, I would. I will.

We all would, to be frank.






So then, the question I ask you is:

Would you ever hit a girl? Have you?

[Bob]

If he disrespects me, I would. I will.

We all would, to be frank.






So then, the question I ask you is:

Would you ever hit a girl? Have you?

Yes, i belive in womens rights

[Benaire]

Hit a child or girl out of anger??? never I would smack the bottom of a my child if i had one but thats the limit.

In my life i have been tempted to hit both and I can say i have only hit a girl once in my life when i was like 5 years old that was it.

[Myrsilus]

I was spanked as a child... I would do it as well since it worked damn well on me. I know many people believe that spanking a child is wrong and is harmful to their development, but I think I developed quite nicely. So yes, they better not step out of line.

A girl, though...? Maybe if she was coming at me with intent to kill me or at least cause severe harm. Other than that, I could never do such a thing.

[Monkey]

It's a tricky question and does depend on how you define "hitting". A lot of campaigners seem to believe that it includes any form of hitting from full out punches to gentle slaps. I believe that in Britain we ended up defining it as "Any strike which causes swelling or bruising", still pretty ambgiuous but does tend to eliminate any severe abuse.

Personally I think that smacking a child does no harm, the laws should be there to prevent full-out child abuse however. If you have to ban moderate smacking in order to prevent the more severe abuse then I don't mind too much. There are always alternatives to it.


The hitting women thing is also a little tricky. Myself, I can't hit a woman. Even if she were threatening my life it would be very hard to defend myself. My brain on the other hand says that they fought for their equal rights and so they should get them, I should be able to punch a woman just as easily as I can a man. I never could though, it just seems wrong, like taking candy from a baby, I'd be wracked with guilt if I ever did.

[hapacheese]

Just about all children up until these last few generations have been spanked, and we've survived. Yes, my children will be spanked when they are bad.

And yes, I have slapped a girl. Only once (not including sparring matches in karate). She went a little crazy (literally) and tried to stab me with the kitchen knife. So, I blocked it, and slapped her to snap her out of it.

If you can get by with not slapping a girl after she tries to stab you, you're a better man than I :D

[Benaire]

I find there is almost never a reason to hit a girl. I am old fashioned in that way. If I had too i would pin her and run.

[Monkey]

Just about all children up until these last few generations have been spanked, and we've survived. Yes, my children will be spanked when they are bad.

And yes, I have slapped a girl. Only once (not including sparring matches in karate). She went a little crazy (literally) and tried to stab me with the kitchen knife. So, I blocked it, and slapped her to snap her out of it.

If you can get by with not slapping a girl after she tries to stab you, you're a better man than I :D


Although I said I could probably never bring myself to hit a woman, it is true that I have never been in a situation like that before. Who knows what I might do if I were? I still don't think I could though :(

After it is pretty easy to disarm or disable someone without having to actually strike them.

[moo]

Last time I recall having a girl hit in a non-playful manner was in karate about a year ago.
We were sparring... now my sensei told me that all I could do was move out of the way, but the room is very cramped(on top of people sitting nearby) so as I was getting around her on a tight turm, I notice her going for my face, so I put my hand up in defence.
She punches me in the hand, and somehow slides off of my hand and punches herself in the nose.

[Katiekoneko]

Hit..matters on what you mean?
Punch a kid? Slap them hard? Beat them up? Like..what?
Like a lil swat on the hand .. I have.
When my nefew kept touching the plugins around the house. Id tell him no.
And then he'd do it again. and I swatted his hand and said "no you don't"
He sticks his lips out and says "I dooooooo"
Thats when he was 10months tho.. so he might have been trying to say I dont.
But it was funny.

Id maybe smack a childs bum too.
But hit? I dont think I would. ever.

[setrict]

I'm all for the occasional spanking to discourage bad behavior. It loses effectiveness if used too often though.

I will never, ever strike anyone who doesn't represent an imminent threat when angry. Adrenaline can turn things ugly really quick. I found out first hand breaking up a fight between friends, when I almost seriously hurt someone before I realized I didn't have nearly the restraint I thought I did. Never again.

If I'm too pissed to disipline right then, I'll schedule it. It's all about the suspense, and time to think about it. The worst punishment dad gave me was the 'switch'. He'd make me go pick my own, then he'd give me a knife to take the bark off with. Then when I'd give him the switch, he'd look it over and if really upset find some fault with it (too small, too big, too short, ugly, whatever) and make me do it all over again. The actual pain was nothing.

[Bob]

Id maybe smack a childs bum too.


Kinky

.....

[Katiekoneko]

Ew...........

[Spaatz965]

Have I stopped beating my wife?
(to fire out another loaded question)

Anyhow, I have two children...Daughter just turned 2, Son is 4.

Have not (yet...or ever I hope) struck either out of anger. However, there have been a couple slapped hands (better than burned hands)...and at least one swatted (single stroke) butt. We haven't started this with our 2 year old, but with our 4 year old the primary method of discipline involves both reward (we use a reward chart) and punishment (ala time outs). Generally seems to work, but my wife is a bit too much of a soft touch...let's things go until they get at her before putting son into time out. I've occasionally put son into time out with anger in my voice...but I try real hard to keep my tone reasonable and caring.

Never a dull moment.

As for women...well, I have to say I absolutely have the paternalistic predjudiced about striking the fairer sex. I've thought about how I'd react if my (or my family's) life were threatened...and I know my reactions would be different with a woman. I'd be less inclined to use overwhelming force...as I would with a man. A woman would have an easier time killing me I suspect.

[eyez0nme]

Bitch, both women and child, need some bitch-slap. That's what they made for, cause we the pimp.

But really, streict--what happen? can you tell us the story of how you ended up beating a guy to a bloody pulp; I mean, this a place to share, like Azrael did.

[Dr. Hobo is my hero]

Beat my children... no I wouldn't beat them. However I'd be all up for a little bit of spanking them if they got to out of line. That and the playful smack to the head when the do something incredibly stupid :) After all we need someone to knock some common sense into us now and then. But on the real I wouldn't do it often. Maybe just enough so that I'll develop some evil eye that when flashed their way the kid would just imagine their punishment and then they'd stop instantly.

[ellie]

My parents never hit me. They were capable of punishing us without resorting to violence. For instance, I remember when I was little and my little sister and I would get into fights, and we would both have to sit in opposite corners in a room, and we wouldn't be allowed out of "time-out" until we had both given each other permission to leave "time-out". So, we had to talk to each other & make up before we were done being punished. I think this is a much more mature way of handling your kids, instead of beating them up when they are misbehaving. I never want to hit my kids.

[koku]

yeah, perhaps I live in a fantasy world but I'd like to raise my kids without ever hitting them(spankings, whatever).

I just think that will be alot better for their mental developement and their relationship with their parents. Oh and yes I was slapped/pinched/whatever as a kid aswell. I turned out ok but that doesn't mean my kids have to go through that.

I always hated my parents after they hit me so why would I want my kid to feel the same?

[Anubis Nine]

I was spanked as a child. But I saw my little brother be excessively spanked. So it's a toss up. Glad I'm not having kids. Because I'd never smack someone else's kid.

Girls I would beat the living tar out of. (I *am* a girl) I'd beat the living tar out of guys too.

[Shamu]

I wasn't going to post anything in this thread, but what the hell.
Just wait untill you all have kids of your own!!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Then you'll see!
Everything you thought you were going to do when you become a parent, toss 1/2 of it out the window! You don't know crap until you become one. And you also have to remember that there is going to (usually) be another parent involved that will have his/her own ideas on parenting as well, that won't always match yours.
My 3 year old is a hellion! Now, I don't spank her on a regular basis, but there comes a time when time-outs DO NOT always work with her. I have to blame myself for her inheriting my stubborn streak.
At this age also, they like to run out into the street, pull the dogs tail (and I dont care if you have the nicest dog in the world, if it's hurting, it will bite), stick their hands into things, like the garbage disposal, ect...
I also speak from experience as a preschool teacher, 9 out of 10 of the parents in my room spanked their kids (of course as a teacher, we were not allowed to, which is a good rule, you shouldn't spank other people's kids).

As for hitting a woman, eh...I've done it before (smacked a girl once), of course I'm a girl so I don't know if that counts.

[AgentOrange]

When I was little my grandfather hit me with a 2x4 when I was bad, it's cause he cares about me.

I didn't used to get spankings, I got beatings. Wooden spoons, belt buckles, switches, double team beating by dad and my grandfather. When I was 10, I was in Wisconsin with my dad at my grandfathers (on his side) house. They lived on a lake and it was mid December. We were in the backyard and I guess I was being a bastard cause my dad picked my up and threw me off the dock into the freezing cold lake, and when I say freezing cold I mean parts of it were frozen over. Needless to say, I stopped being a prick for the rest of the trip.

[Jormungand]

when i was growin up dad wasent around and my mom was a deadbeat so id end up disiplining my brother alot i dont think i ever hit him i found intimidation worked just as good i was always pretty easygoin with him but when i didget pissed he knew to knock it off i nver hit a chick but one time my brother was like 4 and my mom was drunk and we wer gona go somewher and he wasent puttin his shoes on u kno how kids waste time and my mom picked him up by the hair and thru him across the room and he hit his head on the counter and got pretty hurt i got fucken furious at her i was real close to just knocken her out but i dident

[Sbabbari]

I imagine that i would never hit my kids. ever. Unless perhaps it was just a light slap on the hand/bum to press an important point. It's actually a kind of touchy issue for me, because my girlfriend was beaten up as a child by her nutjob father a lot (no, she doesn't have mental problems, but it's a very sad story :()

[RDClip]

"Someon gonna get a hurt real bad." (Russel Peters fans should know what I'm talking about)

Even though I hope to never have children, I wouldn't hit a child. I would probably go into a tirade of yelling and breaking inanimate objects. I don't like it when people cry and I don't know how to deal with it, thus I really want to avoid that situation.

As for a woman. I'll take the old school idea and never hit a woman. But, I can't be beaten by a woman, thus my predicament. (I joke :) probably anyone could beat me to a pulp)

[Pretentious]

My parents never hit me. They were capable of punishing us without resorting to violence. For instance, I remember when I was little and my little sister and I would get into fights, and we would both have to sit in opposite corners in a room, and we wouldn't be allowed out of "time-out" until we had both given each other permission to leave "time-out". So, we had to talk to each other & make up before we were done being punished. I think this is a much more mature way of handling your kids, instead of beating them up when they are misbehaving. I never want to hit my kids.

I shouldn't laugh. Really, I shouldn't. But I do.

[Sock Full of Boiled Dimes]

Hit a child or girl out of anger???

Who doesn't spank their child out of anger?

I'd like to meet the person who doesn't

"OH! You did it now mister! Just you wait til I get in a good mood!"

[Frankey-eh]

I think my dad has hit my brother out of anger once, but that's only because my brother's rebellious and won't yield to pain. As for me, I always showed pain and eventually grew fear out of it, and because of that, I believe I grew up pretty obedient.... in contrast to my brother.

My belief is that the only justified "hitting" is on the butt.

[RDClip]

My belief is that the only justified "hitting" is on the butt.
Did anyone ever wonder why spanking on the butt became the norm?

[AgentOrange]

I always wondered why everyone else got smacked on the butt and why I would always end up getting launched across the room.

[Bob]

Did anyone ever wonder why spanking on the butt became the norm?

Catholicism

[Katiekoneko]

Did anyone ever wonder why spanking on the butt became the norm?
cuz it stings more than other areas?

and didnt ppl used to do it with a belt or something.
Im sure that left welts or bruises at times..
And you can easily cover it up
and Im sure when you have to sit on those bruises and welts later you'll remember that you don't want to do whatever you did to get them again.

[zell583]

boy or girl it doesn't matter to me, if the child misbehaves they will get spanked but not hit unless all other methods have failed and only then would they be hit.

[Jiant Flying Panda]

Child: No way. Well, a little. But only for diciplinary reasons. And being nothing more than a slap on the wrist or a spanking. But I would never hurt mine or any child.

Women: Nope. I would never hit a female. Unless she was going to seriously/fataly harm me or some innocent person then I would frag her ass....

PS: I'm sorry if that last part sounded kind of extreme :(

[Citizen]

Closest thing to hitting my kid I'd ever do is maybe a little flick to the forehead with my thumb and middle finger. Real quick, so he/she doesn't see it coming until it hits. You know, to jar them into reality. Nothing that'd leave a mark.

I would never attack a girl. I wouldn't hit a girl if she possed little to no threat while trying to harm me. But when serious bodily harm is involved, all people become equal in my eyes. Guy with a knife. Girl with a knife. Guy or girl that could seriously injure me in any way. Doesn't matter, I'm fighting back. Also, although it doesn't hurt me very much(I take pain much better than most people), any chick that knees me in the crotch can expect to be knocked the fuck out. That's just trying to hurt and disrespect a guy at the same time.

Gotta be equal. :D

[psychicstooge]

I'm not going to get into my opinions regarding children in general. However, if I was in an applicable situation, then I would most certainly spank a child. I was spanked ONCE as a child. Once was all that was necessary. I learned quickly. Short of extreme physical abuse, I condone corporal punishment in any and all warranted situations.

As for women, I follow the same basic principle that I use for men. If I need to defend myself, I will do so using any means necessary. I will not attack someone without provocation; however, I also will not stand by and let a woman attempt to harm me without raising my defenses. I, too, follow the "equal rights" standard.

Regardless of gender, no quarter will be given.

[Dead Sexy Vocab]

My dad, being the drunkard he is, sometimes beated me. Whenever I revolted, or scare him (I have this crazed snake-eyed look that invokes fear into my dad), he soon just goes on a rampage, screaming, "DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT!!" It really doesn't hurt as much as you think, I just keep on staring at his eyes, and besides, I'm growing taller than him, what's he going to do when I'm freakin' 5'10, 30+ years younger than him?
I'd probably just smack my child's hands, no beating. Show my dad how a father should be like.

[Lateli]

Spanking the kid I could do.. Anything more than that, no. My mother used to spank my sister with a wooden spoon, was hilarious.. "Don't make me get the spoon!" and she'd start crying and run to her room.

I haven't hit a girl, but I wouldn't hesitate to sink my nails into one's face while kicking their shins if the bitch gets hostile and hits me :p I'm a girl though, so I guess it doesn't count..

[Dead Sexy Vocab]

Discipline of Vocab:

Annoyance = Yell
Damage something = Bottom Spank/paddle
Hurt someone else = Evil Eye Look/Long Talk+Hand smack

[Jiant Flying Panda]

I haven't hit a girl, but I wouldn't hesitate to sink my nails into one's face while kicking their shins if the bitch gets hostile and hits me.

Wow......

You know what. I take back anything I said if all girls fight like that :( (Damn it! we need a scared face!). That's just......

[Lateli]

Wow......

You know what. I take back anything I said if all girls fight like that :( (Damn it! we need a scared face!). That's just......

I doubt all fight like that, I just have no pity for people, if they're going to threaten my being, I will do my damndest to remove theirs. It's a strange belief :p

[Psychochink]

I think that a lot of women could use a light spanking, does that count?

[thecheshirekatt3]

For children i would use spanking as punishment or a small pop on the mouth for serious things. I had those things done to me and I'm fine plus my sibling and i will get all out physical not only against eachother but against our parents. Other minor infractions would get time outs.

For women, since I'm a girl, I would punch, kick, bite, pull hair, etc. if I was threatend.

[Benaire]

when i was growin up dad wasent around and my mom was a deadbeat so id end up disiplining my brother alot i dont think i ever hit him i found intimidation worked just as good i was always pretty easygoin with him but when i didget pissed he knew to knock it off i nver hit a chick but one time my brother was like 4 and my mom was drunk and we wer gona go somewher and he wasent puttin his shoes on u kno how kids waste time and my mom picked him up by the hair and thru him across the room and he hit his head on the counter and got pretty hurt i got fucken furious at her i was real close to just knocken her out but i dident

Wow that sucks so badly. I hope things are better now with your family

Yeah i was hit when i was young nothing destroys your enthusiasm for mischief then a sore ass.

[Benaire]

Who doesn't spank their child out of anger?

I'd like to meet the person who doesn't

"OH! You did it now mister! Just you wait til I get in a good mood!"

When i say hit i mean HIT!!! punch to the face with all your strength. I think your talking about smack.


P.S. I would smack a girl too if she asked nicely enough. :D

[h2orowe]

I might be able to spank a kid at the most.... there is soooooo many more ways of dealing with that stuff.... Time outs, talking with them NOT SHOUTING but talking, forcing them to sit somewhere, making them bored, and other things.
I would never ever ever hit a girl. Unless some crazy guy was like Slap this girl or I'll shoot her.

My mom's boyfriend has strangled me before, and I know all that did was make me pissed off. I didn't even do anything wrong, just stuck up for my mom, and he strangled me; that didn't make me respect him, that didn't make me want to lie for him, that didn't make me want to take his side.... all that did was make me hate him to the point where I prayed he'd die.... it was funny, I prayed he would get sick or just something horrible happen to him, and (this was on a trip to the mountains when he attacked me) on the last day, he got like sick from a kidney stone he used to have! Go God!

He's hit my mom and shoved her a few times. I see no need to hit anyone let alone hit a female/child. A person who resorts to hitting someone weaker than themselves is just a low life. I am not saying all girls are weak.... but it's just how our cultures views are.

There was one instance where I hit a girl, but it wasn't my choice... I had to.
This girl named Beverly used to always get me in chokeholds and such in 7th grade (she got expelled later for just being a psycho hosebeast) but like.... she got me in a chokehold and starting actually making me suffocate..... -.- I hate myself for this.. but I NOT HARD! elbowed her in the gut, and she let go, than I distanced myself from her.


Still, I'd sooner die with my morals than die fighting a child/girl. People I respect the most are ones with strong morals.
My mom's Boyfriend has an awesome work ethic.... but the shit he's done in the past... and what he's done to us.... man.... he deserves to die.....
I guess on a few occasions he used to drug girls and rape them, he was like 22 and had sex with 15 year olds, he's done coke alot ( to the point where his voice is shrill and nasaly), he's sold coke, he's done other drugs, he's beaten the shit out of his son for something he didn't even do, he's pretty much got me and my family trapped in a shitty situation, and also he checks out like 14 year old girls and he's said before "Mexican girls are only hot til they turn 12, than they become fat and ugly"

I seriously hope this guy fucking dies.....
Errr.....
I'm probably saying to much but I hate this guy...... -.- I've almost killed him before but my mom friggin' talked me out of it............... I got up to get a knife, because he was passed out drunk on his bed.... and like I could've just easily gone up there, and just STABBED him in the heart, the back of the head, the face, chopped off some fingers, got him in they eyes, and just overall left him unrecognizable. He's one lucky son of a bitch that noone has killed him yet...... I swear I will end up doing it.... but I just want to go to college and get out of here.... but I doubt that will happen.

Anyway :/ I'd sooner die than ever physically harm a female/child.

[RDClip]

When i say hit i mean HIT!!! punch to the face with all your strength. I think your talking about smack.


P.S. I would smack a girl too if she asked nicely enough. :D
I think it's pretty obvious that no one here would (or admit to) planning to punch a child full force. Anyone who does that is a piece of shit, no matter if they have anger issues or are dirty drunks. Anyone who beats their child like that really shouldn't be a parent.

[PopCulturePooka]

My children will be gettin' spankings for misbehaving.

My brother and I got spankings and turned out fine. Its all moderation.

Hit a girl?
I have already.
In 8th grade (when you are 13 here) I was a tiny guy. Second shortest guy in our school and the lightest. I was bullied mercilessly physically by a girl from shop class. She was big. Way big. Bigger than quite a few guys in my grade. She was a terrifying beast of EVIL.

One day the bullying got to much. She'd stolen something important of mine (which I no longer recall what it was). As she was walking calmly off with it I ran up and delivered a spinning haymaker punch to the back of her head. (Un)fortunately I had the momentum and I hit her in just the right spot to hurt her. She had tears welling up just as a teacher busted us.

And I was the one who got in trouble for violence. Joy.

Have a funny story about seeing her a few years later actually.

[Kaji]

Regarding why we spank the ass and not elsewhere, the extra muscle there provides more padding, and you're much less likely to damage anything there. It's the "safest" place to strike repeatedly on the human body.

As for me, I personally believe in corporal punishment. Leather belt for the most severe offenses, exercises and such for slightly less severe, slaps on the wrist for the least severe things that need to be addressed (with small children, not bothering with the slap when they get over about 5), and then adding in time out/grounding/loss of privlidges as suitable to the crime. Strictly using nonphysical punishments tends to teach the children that the "punishments" don't really hurt at all. Tell him that since he was playing video games when he was supposed to be doing his homework he's going to go back to his room and do his homework. Kid decides to ignore you and keep doing what he's doing. How are you going to make him budge? Picking him up and dropping him at his desk doesn't seem to be an option, in most people's minds. Rewards are a nice motivator, but eventually children grow tired of them. A 5-year-old will do anything for a quarter, a 15-year-old will say it's not worth it for anything less than $10.

[yao_yao]

Spankings and slaps to hand for punishment. only. that does not mean abuse.

hitting a girl... um i was a nasty kid. when i was like 4, some girl was teasing me cuz i couldnt speak english, and started hitting cuz i couldnt understand. I kinda broke her arm.... *cough*

[Praetorian]

Kids; I don't know. Depends how old they are and how bad they've behaved.


Girls/women; If they anger me like a man, or even hit me like a man, they're going to get the same beating as a man would. I don't want this double standards crap, this is the 21st century folks. I believe firmly in equality. And believe it or not, most women (some actual feminists) and girls I've asked this question to feel the same way about it as I do.

Feminazis (entirely different from feminists) firmly disagree, however. But the opinion of feminazis is ignored anyway.

[Kustom]

I think it's pretty obvious that no one here would (or admit to) planning to punch a child full force. Anyone who does that is a piece of shit, no matter if they have anger issues or are dirty drunks. Anyone who beats their child like that really shouldn't be a parent.

I once threw a beer in a child's face, who must have been no more than 10. It wasn't in anger, though, only for fun. :p

He shouldn't have tried to be a smart ass. We were still friends after that though, I failed to traumatize him.

[Jay]

We all would, to be frank.

I wouldn't. Not now, not ever. I went through enough of it when I was a child.

Would you ever hit a girl? Have you?

...Depends what you mean by "hit". :D

"Punch a girl"? No WAY. Not ever.

"Would you hit that"? Hell yeah. :D

[RDClip]

I once threw a beer in a child's face, who must have been no more than 10. It wasn't in anger, though, only for fun. :p

He shouldn't have tried to be a smart ass. We were still friends after that though, I failed to traumatize him.
Well, that's giving alcohol to a minor. :eek:

[Kustom]

Well, that's giving alcohol to a minor. :eek:

Damn! You're right!!! Suddenly I feel bad.

[Spaatz965]

I remember when I was little and my little sister and I would get into fights, and we would both have to sit in opposite corners in a room, and we wouldn't be allowed out of "time-out" until we had both given each other permission to leave "time-out". So, we had to talk to each other & make up before we were done being punished.

Day-um...I like it. Need to tell wife about this one. Might come in handy once my daughter is being put into time out. Thanks for the great idea Ellie.

Everything you thought you were going to do when you become a parent, toss 1/2 of it out the window! You don't know crap until you become one. And you also have to remember that there is going to (usually) be another parent involved that will have his/her own ideas on parenting as well, that won't always match yours.

Right on Shamu...this is so true, but a lesson most of us don't really internalize until we're in the situation.

At this age also, they like to run out into the street, pull the dogs tail (and I dont care if you have the nicest dog in the world, if it's hurting, it will bite), stick their hands into things, like the garbage disposal, ect...

Yup yup....better a smack on the hand or a sore butt than a burned hand or being hit by a car, etc...

Unless she was going to seriously/fataly harm me or some innocent person then I would frag her ass....

This statement pretty much mirrors my phillosophy on violence. No half measures. If you're going to do it, by god do it. Probably comes from my military training. If you pull a weapon, expect to use it. If you fire your weapon, shoot to kill...'cause damned sure if you pull a weapon and don't expect to use it, it will be used upon you...and if you don't shoot to kill, you can expect to be shot at and killed. I will try to avoid a violent confrontation if at all possible, and I've been very successful at avoidance...but if one is forced upon me, my objective is to incapacitate my oponent as quickly and completely as possible for me to escape the situation with the least harm to myself (when refering to myself, I include my family in that thought).

h2orowe...I've read several of your posts about your mom's boyfriend. You are in a terribly messed up situation. Keep yourself as safe as possible, and don't let the fucker lure you into doing something that will screw up the rest of your life. But then again, you've probably heard that before. Good luck man.

[KiwiKitty]

Smack children? Yeah. Go all-out psycho wailing on their asses? No. Was I smacked as a child for things I didn't do? Yeah, but that was far outweighed by the smacks I got for things I DID do ;) We've got a culture in this country now where you have utter ****s of young 20somethings and teenagers who have no respect for anyone or anything, let alone themselves, and I think a lot of that comes from the decline in discipline - too many parents who haven't smacked their kids or punished them in any meaningful way (I have seen this happen in my family, as well as others).

Women? Like Pooka, I have had some... not-so-nice run-ins with girls as a kid. For me, it wasn't the "don't hit girls" thing that stopped me hitting back so much as it was the "don't fight" line I got from my parents... I ended up being unable to defend myself and a target for everyone, and it was only a few years ago I bothered to start trying to get over that. The weaker-sex thing may have been true once, but it's not now and hasn't been for 20, 30 years. If someone picks a fight with me and won't stop (I don't start swinging straight away, I try and talk people down from fights rather than get in them... haven't been in one in... god, 12 years now?), then I respond with enough force to stop them. Once they stop, I stop. Not interested in fighting.

Hasn't happened with a woman yet, but I'd do the same there. If they keep coming at me, and won't stop trying to hurt me, I'm going to defend myself, aggressively if need be. At that point, it's not my fault.

As to actually causing injury to a woman, I *did* break my last gf's nose once. In my defence, I did tell her I was extremely ticklish and tried to convince her to stop, but she thought tickling me was so damned funny she kept at it until I couldn't help but spasm... one of my knees which I'd had clasped to my chest clipped the tip of her nose and she went down like a log. We found out two days later it had broken. One of those stupid accident things, but it freaked me right out.

[Kass]

I never want to hit my kids.

With the exception of particularly nasty substandard members of the human race, no one wants to hit their kids. It's not a sport you know. No remotely decent parent sits around and says, "Gee honey, I'm bored. Wanna go smack the brats around? We haven't done that in ages."

Would I hit, as in throw a punch, beat or unnecessarily cause pain to my child? Of course not. Has she gotten her hand slapped or her butt smacked? You can bet your sweet Aunt Fanny she has.

I laugh hysterically at people who say you should reason with your young child, talk to them, and explain why it is wrong or dangerous. Ever have a reasonable conversation with a two-year-old? Ever tried to use logic to convince a toddler that touching a hot stove is an unwise course of action? How about trying to talk through a pre-schooler's cranky tantrum?

It DOES NOT work. No matter how you cut it, their mental abilities do NOT yet include higher reasoning. So you use rewards for good behavior. I prefer praise to material things for most occasions because it reeks of bribery if for every little thing they get some sort of goody. You discipline when they misbehave.

I never liked time outs. It isn't discipline if your kid has to sit and watch TV for three minutes for dumping glue on the floor, or even just sit and let their mind wander. Making them clean up the mess and taking away ALL their crafts is discipline. Yes, a small child can help clean up a mess.

For immediate danger, you don't have time for that. If your kid is reaching for the flame on gas stove, you don't put them in time out, you yell to startle them into hesitating and smack their hand away. Part of it is just practical. They just might continue to stick their hand in the flame if you don't. The other part of it is to leave a lasting impression on their brains, not their hands. You want them to remember that when they did something wrong, it sucked.

I've used spankings about three times and all of them were for situations that posed immediate danger or were so grossly insolent that the most severe punishment was necessary. The scariest incident that earned the hardest spanking the kiddo ever got was the day I discovered she could undo the buckle on her stroller. We were beside the car and I was leaning in to adjust the car seat. She was buckled in her stroller. She was about 18 months old. She unbuckled herself and was out and running across a mall parking lot lickety split. She ran out from between the cars and nearly got hit. I caught her, snatched her up and laid three of the hardest smacks on her butt I could without actually genuinely injuring her. I wanted to make damned sure she NEVER forgot what happens when she runs away from Mommy in a parking lot.

When we got home, I held her for an hour because I knew I was VERY lucky to still have her. You and I understand that, but she never would have at that age. She did, however, understand that when she runs in parking lots, she gets a sore butt and an angry Mommy. Running in parking lot=angry mommy/sore butt. Running in parking lots=BAD.

This is what you end up with if all you ever do is talk at your child:

One day, my coworker and I decided to go see the Christmas trees at the American History Museum on our lunch hour and pick up a couple of things for gifts while there. We ended up in line behind a couple with the most obnoxious, spoiled, miserable, little beast to ever be called a child. The 5- or 6-year-old had an arm load of items, as did the parents. He was running around, screaming and trying to push his way into line ahead of the 10 people who managed to get in line before them.

There was an endless litany of “Johnny, don’t do that. Johnny, don’t push people. Johnny, it isn’t polite to yell at people.” No kidding. Really? We all get it. Your kid needs a refresher course.

Johnny’s mom finally handed over her pile of books to hubby, which incidentally were all for Johnny the Demon Spawn, and picked up said spawn. She gave him a big hug and said, “I love you Johnny. Please stop being naughty.”

“I love you. Please stop? Naughty?” Since when do you ASK an unruly, out of control child to “please stop?” Naughty is hiding Daddy’s left shoe. Pushing and hitting people is absolutely unacceptable and a prime example of piss poor parenting.

You know what Johnny’s response was? He PUNCHED his mother in the face. She very calmly informed Johnny it wasn’t nice to hit people, to which he replied by hitting her AGAIN.

Some moron in line behind Nancy and I told the woman he admired how she was using non-violent parenting techniques. Near as we could tell, she wasn’t parenting AT ALL. She went on to explain how she and her husband didn’t believe in hitting. They discuss and explain proper behavior to their child.

First off, hitting exists. It is a real thing. You can like it or not like it, but the question of belief is irrelevant. It’s like not believing in chairs. You can not believe in chairs all you want, but they are still going to keep your butt from hitting the ground when you sit in them. You can not believe hitting is acceptable, but hitting exists.

Second, you’re doing a lousy job of discussing and explaining. Proof of that is continuing to hit you as you carry on your conversation over the intolerably loud screams of your mewling brat.

Mr. I-Admire-How-Well-You-Take-A-Punch proceeded to recommend a book on non-violent parenting that he wrote (go figure) and espouse the evils of parents who raise their voice, hurt a child’s feelings or God forbid, spank their child.

Meanwhile, the clerk is yelling to try and get your attention to tell you to take your kid out of the gift shop, your milquetoast husband is picking out still MORE things for Johnny and Johnny is hitting you hard enough to leave red marks on your face.

All this because Johnny wants to be first in line to get his stuff.

About the time the book came up, someone left to get a security guard. Johnny, still not getting his way, upped the volume and the hitting and one swing hit the person in front of them. Mom apologized and again informed Johnny that hitting wasn’t nice.

I finally said something before my ears began to bleed from the screeching. “No kidding lady. We all know hitting isn’t nice. Neither is throwing a tantrum in a museum gift shop. Most of us learned that before we were Johnny’s age. Obviously, he doesn’t get it and you haven’t taught it. I don’t particularly care what you believe in or don’t believe in as far as parenting goes, but for Christ’s sake, be a parent. Your kid is disrupting the entire floor of the museum and making everyone miserable. He’s hit several people and is well on his way to giving you a black eye. This might be okay in your house, but it isn’t in public—a lesson both you and Johnny could benefit from. Would you please take him out of here so the rest of us can enjoy the museum and make our purchases in relative peace? Oh, and why are you buying him rewards for behaving like this? Put the books and toys back. Geez.”

She was stunned, but I’m not entirely sure it wasn’t from taking repeated blows to the head. Book Guy shut up too. Unfortunately, Johnny didn’t. The other customer returned with the guard and he did ask them to leave the museum. Mom and Johnny left, but not before she handed Milquetoast all the books and toys and left him to buy them.

You know what Johnny learned, and it sure wasn’t it isn’t okay to hit? He learned that if he screams loud enough and pushes people, Mom gives him a hug and says I love you. He learned that if he pitches a fit, he gets toys and presents. He learned that he can hit people without repercussion; it IS okay to hit. He learned *HE* is in charge of that family.

Not a single one of those was the right lesson. That child will have problems in school. He will be a bully. He will end up in trouble. He’ll probably end up in juvenile court and possibly even jail. He’ll never work for anything in his life because his parents will give him whatever he wants, whether he needs or has earned it or not. It will be their fault because they were more concerned about Johnny’s feelings and what a smack on the butt would do to his psyche. Well, it sure wouldn’t do as much damage as what they were doing which was nothing.

If people find alternate ways to a pop on the hand or a smack on the butt and the work, more power to them, but the problem with most kids who get in trouble is that their parents didn’t DO anything. Talking is not doing.

[Shamu]

See? Listen to us mom's and dad's ;) We know what we're talking about. Most of us don't spank or smack our children out of anger, it's mostly out of fear (such as Kass's daughter figuring out to undo the straps on her stroller and running out in to traffic). My daughter figured out how to undo some of the straps on her car seat and would undo them right in the middle of driving down the interstate which always sent me into a panic. But a swat on the hand and she learned to stop doing it. It's not that you do it offten, but reasoning with a toddler just doesn't work, they don't understand what danger is yet.
For all of you that were more than swated at as children, I kinda have an idea with that too, my ex-step father was an alchoholic and I got more than a swat on a few occasions.

[Nyden]

Would I smack my kids, yes. What Kass, and KiwiKitty say is true. You need to discipline your child. A few years back when I was out for a walk. Some little girl no older then 7 or 8 maybe alittle old put her bike right in the middle of the side walk. Then some lady yells out, I was thinking it was her mother. To put the bike away to which the girl says back to her mother. F you Whore, come out and do it you Fing self. :eek: I was shocked to say the least.

I also bleave in the haveing your child taste soap, Not eat it just give them a little itty bitty piece. This worked well for my sister, my father had her do it around 7 or 8 maybe a little younger, for saying a curse now sure what one. She is now 11 almost 12 and to this day she absolutely refuses to say a curse. One time it was raining out and my brother says he is not walking out in this shit, and not thinking she says what shit. She apologized for it. Was kinda funny.

[Sock Full of Boiled Dimes]

Sha!

http://www.thebestpageintheuniverse.net/c.cgi?u=beat

[Wysen]

My wife and I haven't had to spank, hit, or smack our son since he was about 4, he is 8 now. The only times he has been swatted on the butt or smacked in the past was to wake him up from being a little turd and realize he was being told not to do the thing he's doing.

From age 2 to 4, it's just what has to be done sometimes to get the child to focus his attention on angry parent rant to stop climbing the 3rd floor railing of a balcony. Kids are pretty much suicidal up to age 4ish. You are constantly having to keep an eye on them to prevent them from harming themselves.

But no, after they realize what that stern tone is in your voice, or the look on your face is, we just haven't had to worry about physical punishment to resolve issues. In fact, I can scare the crap out of my son and call him into line just by a look on my face. You'd think I beat him by the way he reacts to that look.

I was spanked and hit with a spoon as a child. The spankings never detered me, the spoon never stopped me from being a little shit. My problem as a child was that my parents hardly paid any attention to me, so when they did beat me, they were at least paying attention to what I was doing. Its called negative attention, and if that's the majority of the attention you're giving your child, its the wrong way to go about things.

Encourge the child for what they do right, give them positive attention. That's the best way you can teach your child how to act. It's not the easiest thing in the world to do because it is much easier to focus on the bad and not the good. But it's how we've raised one so far and he's turned out good, so far.

[Snake eyeS]

well smacking a kid is not my idea of fun, but i dont think its wrong to hit your child if he did something wrong, i would hit him/her just hard enough to get the message trough.

a girl, well ive been beaten up by a girl ones. I was drunk and refused to do anything while this chick totally went bezerk on my face, after 8 hits i tasted my own blood and ran off. i was 16 back then and the girl was 20. ever since that incident i will hit a girl if she starts fighting with me. if she just decides to go loco on me for a minute i woudnt mind but just restrain her, but if she really was trowing in punches to try and win the fight, she would get 1 hit and 1 hit only, if i can floor a guy in 1 hit, i sure as hell can end a chickfight with 1 punch.
but if i hit a girl knockout im sure to be having fights with atleast 5 bystanders, i have jumped a guy before because he was hitting his girl.

[Praetorian]

I don't get it. Why is it totally OK for men to be hit by both women and men, but suddenly all hell breaks loose when a guy tries to physically defend himself against a female that's going berserk on him?


Seriously, this is an actual question. I really do not understand.

[Shamu]

I think it's perfectly ok to hit a woman (if you're a man) if you're defending yourself! I, for one have no problems with that. You have the right to defend yourself.

[Jay]

I think it's perfectly ok to hit a woman (if you're a man) if you're defending yourself! I, for one have no problems with that. You have the right to defend yourself.

Two people, one a woman, one a man. The woman randomly punches the man. The man punches the woman back and people whinge about how he hits women.

Why is it okay for one to punch the other, but not vice versa?

[Snake eyeS]

Because females cant defend themselfs that well as some men, trough the ages the stereotype of girls that cant fight and guys that can has been imbedded in our brain.. i jumped that patricular guy because he was kicking and hitting his girl who was only screaming at him for bieng a drunk, if i saw that girl punch him in the face while he did nothing wrong i would not of jumped him. its about an even fight i guess, i will always try to help the team that will loose, in this case its a female that doesnt weigh more then 65kg orso against a guy that weighed around 90kg. that just isnt fair.

you guys just walk by when a guy gets the shit hit out of him? if i havent seen
the reason of the fight i will always try to help stop the fight. but if the guy had it coming to him, then i wont do a damn thing but cheer :)

[LJustus]

I would rather my 2 year old son feel a slight sting on his bottom than for him to come to harm or grow up to be a selfish or unkind person. I have swatted him on the butt a couple of times to get a point across.

As for hitting a woman, I have never hit a woman. As a divorced man, let me tell you that this has not always been easy. My ex would sometimes throw things AT MY HEAD. My only recourse was to leave the room, calm down, and try to go back later and work out whatever the difference of opinion was.

[Loc]

I'd never hit a child or a woman, it must've been ploughed into my mind as a child as I really couldn't do it.

[D-pad]

I'd slap a child over the age of 5 with a force if they do something wrong.

A woman I wouldn't hit unless she tries to hit me first. Then I'd prolly just punch her enough to where she stopped......

[Praetorian]

I think not hitting a woman on the pure grounds that they are women is sexist. Both towards men and demeaning towards women. I practice Karate, and there are plenty of girls that can kick the living hell out of almost anybody at our dojo.


If someone were to say 'You've just royally pissed me off, and you hit me in the face, but I'm not going to hit you because you wear glasses' is demeaning. I don't wear glasses, just for your information. But if I did I'd like to be hit just like any other person. At least I'd welcome them to try.

[Janken]

My dad used to beat me, and that didn't do anything except make me hate him, so I wouldn't beat my future child or girlfriend/wife.

[LJustus]

But I wouldn't go around hitting some guy I had a disagreement with either. Back in my younger days (in the Army), it seems that I was constantly getting into "scuffles" at some bar, usually caused by one of my buddies hitting on some dude's girlfriend and the guy taking offense. I haven't been in an actual fight in about 8 years.

[General_Admission]

Wow, I'm surprised how many people hit their kids. O_o

I'm not sure about how other families work, but in mine none of us have ever been hit. Yeah my dad will get mad and might give me a push (extremely rare...can only think of this happening twice), but everything is done verbaly or through consequences. It may just be our personalties though. When I was little I respected my parents above anything else. Letting them down was my worst fear. I would get extremely upset if I did something my mom didn't like. Everything was either time outs or taking things away. Taking things away were not immediate things, but long term consequnces. Now I'm 17 however so I challenge them, but in a verbal and humane way. <-- and usually win :D

I have never hit anyone in my life, other then getting physical in sports, never been in a fight, and have never acted on my emotions. I have a huge respect for women and will never hit one unless she obviously has injuring (above just pain) or lethal intentions against me or anyone else. I've never found a need to hit people because I have developed verbal skills that allow me to either talk people down or not make me or another the object of their violence. I don't allow myself to be dragged into such situations.

What has resulted from this? An extremely good kid with an IQ in the top 3%, 4th in his class of 660+ kids, president of the forensics team for 3 years, skipped ahead one year in math (my grandfather skipped 2 grades but regretted it because he never had any friends, so my mom only let me go ahead in math because other kids my age were doing it too), in numerous clubs (Mu Alpah Theta, Latin Club, Debate Club, HOSA, NHS) and hold officer positions in some, I volunteer at a hospital once a month, have a huge respect for women and I plan on never divorcing my wife because I will listen to my paretns and take their opnions into consideration (although thye let me do whatever I want...when I was little they protected me, but once I was 12 or so they let me make my own decisions even if they were bad, I've never really rebelled agaisnt my parents so I've never done anything dangerous). There's more I can list but I don't want to sound pompous.

Bad things that have resulted from this:

Couldn't date until Junior year of HS...JUNIOR YEAR! :mad:
Fear of violence...as in being hurt. >.><.<
Maybe a few fetishes but they are normal...I hope :D

[Kass]

Yes, and my daughter made all honors classes this year, got perfect scores on all her testing last year, has been playing cello for four years, is trying out for the cross country track team, is on a swim team, makes quilts and fleece blankets for Project Linus (http://www.projectlinus.org), gave all of her Christmas money last year to the International Red Cross for Tsunami relief efforts and spent all her allowance she saved this summer on toiletries for the Katrina evacuees staying at the DC Armory.

I get compliments from adults all the time telling me she's the only kid they know who says yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir, please, thank you and excuse me without prompting. When our neighbor's apartment burned down, she gave half of all her toys to the 6-year-old girl who lost all her toys.

Your point would be?

[General_Admission]

Yes, and my daughter made all honors classes this year, got perfect scores on all her testing last year, has been playing cello for four years, is trying out for the cross country track team, is on a swim team, makes quilts and fleece blankets for Project Linus (http://www.projectlinus.org), gave all of her Christmas money last year to the International Red Cross for Tsunami relief efforts and spent all her allowance she saved this summer on toiletries for the Katrina evacuees staying at the DC Armory.

I get compliments from adults all the time telling me she's the only kid they know who says yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir, please, thank you and excuse me without prompting. When our neighbor's apartment burned down, she gave half of all her toys to the 6-year-old girl who lost all her toys.

Your point would be?

That hitting is not essential to bringing a kid up right. That's all.

[Benaire]

Ok why its generally bad to hit a women? Besides the fact that she is 5.3 and about 100lbs and your 6.4 and 250lbs. Its how your are brought up

[Shamu]

Like I said before, all you non-parents just wait.
GA, I bet you got swated a few times as a toddler and you just don't remember it.
My daughter is turning out just fine too. She can speak two different languages (with a smattering of two more), can read and write her own name, and is turning out to be a good equestrian too, and she's only 3.
I think the point is, that you can get you're butt smacked for things that are deserving and still turn out to be a good person. ;)

[Jay]

Like I said before, all you non-parents just wait.
GA, I bet you got swated a few times as a toddler and you just don't remember it.
My daughter is turning out just fine too. She can speak two different languages (with a smattering of two more), can read and write her own name, and is turning out to be a good equestrian too, and she's only 3.
I think the point is, that you can get you're butt smacked for things that are deserving and still turn out to be a good person. ;)

Holy cow, and she's only three! :eek:

I hope I'm as advanced at three as your daughter. You must be doing a heck of a job, well done.

[Wysen]

Pretty impressive for 3. But they say that that age is the best time to teach languages to a child.

I'm 30 and all I can speak are English and Redneck.

[Kass]

General Admission, I'm willing to be you got some pretty wicked discipline in other manners though.

Spanking is NOT wrong nor is it evil. Quite frankly, when used sparingly and only in extreme cases on children too young to reason with, it works. As children grow older parents learn other punishments that are effective and sometimes hurt more, even without laying a hand on them.

Pretty much all the people in here who don't have kids who pontificate on how it is appropriate to raise children will be in for a seriously rude awakening if and when they have kids. As someone else said, throw it out the window.

I'm raising a child. I've worked with the best of kids with the Scouts. I've worked with the worst in the juvenile justice system. More than any other group of kids, the ones who get in trouble are the ones whose parents never disciplined them, never told them no and never *did* anything and only *talked* to their kids. They had the worst attitudes, the least amount of compassion and were often very cruel because they just didn't care.

Then the second group would be the ones who were beaten, not spanked, but beaten, abused (by neglect or emotionally) or molested. Beating children is never okay. Third would be the kids who made stupid mistakes.

That job was the hardest I had. I went home every day furious or distraught over what I saw. Parents are increasingly irresponsible and lack authority in their own homes and that is evident by the ever increasing percentage of young people who end up in the criminal justice system or are just asses.

edit because I was too slow on the submit button

[hapacheese]

If someone were to say 'You've just royally pissed me off, and you hit me in the face, but I'm not going to hit you because you wear glasses' is demeaning. I don't wear glasses, just for your information. But if I did I'd like to be hit just like any other person. At least I'd welcome them to try.

Actually, I would not recommend hitting someone with glasses. It actually carries a heavier legal penalty than hitting someone without glasses (at least in the US it does).

And also, you run a chance of *severely* damaging the person's face (and your hand) with the glass.

[El Jasma]

When I was a kid I would get my ass whipped plenty ( considering want my Moms got it was a walk in the park ). Now I will give my kids a spanking when need be, you just can't do it for every little thing because it will get to the point where it has no effect. ( actually I'm way too light hearted to do it so I guess it will be up to thire mom, I 'll be the good cop :D )

[Monkey]

Wow, I'm surprised how many people hit their kids. O_o

I'm not sure about how other families work, but in mine none of us have ever been hit. Yeah my dad will get mad and might give me a push (extremely rare...can only think of this happening twice), but everything is done verbaly or through consequences. It may just be our personalties though. When I was little I respected my parents above anything else. Letting them down was my worst fear. I would get extremely upset if I did something my mom didn't like. Everything was either time outs or taking things away. Taking things away were not immediate things, but long term consequnces. Now I'm 17 however so I challenge them, but in a verbal and humane way. <-- and usually win :D

What has resulted from this? An extremely good kid with an IQ in the top 3%, 4th in his class of 660+ kids, president of the forensics team for 3 years, skipped ahead one year in math (my grandfather skipped 2 grades but regretted it because he never had any friends, so my mom only let me go ahead in math because other kids my age were doing it too), in numerous clubs (Mu Alpah Theta, Latin Club, Debate Club, HOSA, NHS) and hold officer positions in some, I volunteer at a hospital once a month, have a huge respect for women and I plan on never divorcing my wife because I will listen to my paretns and take their opnions into consideration (although thye let me do whatever I want...when I was little they protected me, but once I was 12 or so they let me make my own decisions even if they were bad, I've never really rebelled agaisnt my parents so I've never done anything dangerous). There's more I can list but I don't want to sound pompous.


Yes, and my daughter made all honors classes this year, got perfect scores on all her testing last year, has been playing cello for four years, is trying out for the cross country track team, is on a swim team, makes quilts and fleece blankets for Project Linus, gave all of her Christmas money last year to the International Red Cross for Tsunami relief efforts and spent all her allowance she saved this summer on toiletries for the Katrina evacuees staying at the DC Armory.

I get compliments from adults all the time telling me she's the only kid they know who says yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir, please, thank you and excuse me without prompting. When our neighbor's apartment burned down, she gave half of all her toys to the 6-year-old girl who lost all her toys.


Two differing opinions both turning out as a success.

I think the point at hand is that you are more likely to successfully raise a child with smacking than you are with non-smacking methods (I hate saying Non-violent as it implies smacking is violent when it really isn't, it's not malicious or anything). Quite frankly if faced with a choice; smacking your child to keep them safe, or using non-smacking methods, I would choose smacking every time as I would have a better chance of raising a child well.

(Why do all my arguments end up sounding very statistical and scientific? :p)

Don't forget it takes a lot more time and patience to raise a child without smacking them, having to think up various methods of punishing them that they will actually understand. It is uneasonable to expect every parent to have such time. Especially seeing as I would think most people don't have a problem with smacking (I don't personally) therfore it is much better to use that method than to risk raising a tearaway (or worse, having your child get injured).

Note: I'm not saying that parents with a lot of time on their hands shouldn't use smacking. I think that you should, it's the best method in my opinion to really encourage them to do the right thing (or at least, not to do the wrong thing). I'm just saying that you shouldn't expect all parents to be able to raise children using "new age" methods.

In Scotland they banned any form of hitting your child I seem to recall, I really don't agree with it personally. In England we managed to get some half-assed law passed whereby you are allowed to hit your child just as long as you don't cause reddening of the skin.

[eyez0nme]

My wife and I haven't had to spank, hit, or smack our son since he was about 4, he is 8 now. The only times he has been swatted on the butt or smacked in the past was to wake him up from being a little turd and realize he was being told not to do the thing he's doing.

From age 2 to 4, it's just what has to be done sometimes to get the child to focus his attention on angry parent rant to stop climbing the 3rd floor railing of a balcony. Kids are pretty much suicidal up to age 4ish. You are constantly having to keep an eye on them to prevent them from harming themselves.

But no, after they realize what that stern tone is in your voice, or the look on your face is, we just haven't had to worry about physical punishment to resolve issues. In fact, I can scare the crap out of my son and call him into line just by a look on my face. You'd think I beat him by the way he reacts to that look.

I was spanked and hit with a spoon as a child. The spankings never detered me, the spoon never stopped me from being a little shit. My problem as a child was that my parents hardly paid any attention to me, so when they did beat me, they were at least paying attention to what I was doing. Its called negative attention, and if that's the majority of the attention you're giving your child, its the wrong way to go about things.

Encourge the child for what they do right, give them positive attention. That's the best way you can teach your child how to act. It's not the easiest thing in the world to do because it is much easier to focus on the bad and not the good. But it's how we've raised one so far and he's turned out good, so far.

I love you.

I'd never hit a child or a woman, it must've been ploughed into my mind as a child as I really couldn't do it.


My dad used to beat me, and that didn't do anything except make me hate him, so I wouldn't beat my future child or girlfriend/wife.

When you get a child, you will beat him the way your father beat you. And you'll understand why.

[eyez0nme]

That job was the hardest I had. I went home every day furious or distraught over what I saw. Parents are increasingly irresponsible and lack authority in their own homes and that is evident by the ever increasing percentage of young people who end up in the criminal justice system or are just asses.



Because they were beaten as a kid.

[PopCulturePooka]

Because they were beaten as a kid.
Smacking for misbehaviour =/= beating.

[Frankey-eh]

Like I said before, all you non-parents just wait.
GA, I bet you got swated a few times as a toddler and you just don't remember it.
My daughter is turning out just fine too. She can speak two different languages (with a smattering of two more), can read and write her own name, and is turning out to be a good equestrian too, and she's only 3.
I think the point is, that you can get you're butt smacked for things that are deserving and still turn out to be a good person. ;)

She sounds just like me ^_^ My first language is Cantonese but I learned Japanese when I was two and a half, so by three, I was writing and reading Japanese fluently. In addition, my parents crammed me with math problems...

Although none of this involved any spanking for me. If you had to spank your kid to have them learn another language, that's a little harsh... She might grow up to hate languages.

---------

A little side note... get her to learn a third language when she's about nine or ten. It worked out really well for me. After nine, you've had three years of public education in your second language so you've got the basics (like for Kanji, it makes learning others a lot easier.). When you start the third language, it usually takes three years, so by twelve you'll catch up. Then, after one year of rest, you can start taking a foreign language in high school with the rest of the kids.

That's what I did and now I do okay in four: Japanese, Cantonese, English, and French.

[Shamu]

snip.
Don't worry, I don't beat my kid :eek:! She gets the occasional spank for things that put her in danger and she won't reason about. Other than that, I don't beat her into learning new languages :p .
I was an International Relations/Pre-Law major in college, so I have alot of intrest in foreign languages and like to teach them to my daughter. My family is Swedish by decent and I used to speak it somewhat. So I teach her the basics of that. I also took Japanese in high school and still speak alittle bit of that to her, I've also taught her some VERY basic Kanji, which she can read and is starting to write. Mostly though I speak Spanish with her. Down here in the south, I think it's really important that she be able to speak/read/write in Spanish (and Iberian and Latin American History were my minors). Other than that, she's pretty good with English now. I'm very proud of her, if ya'll couldn't tell!
Kass, I just wanted to say that your daughter sounds amazing as well! Playing cello is incredibly hard (I know, I played violin/viola for years). And I really wish mine would learn to say yes ma'am, no ma'am, ect...She's getting better about it, but she's still learning I guess. :)
Yay for us mom's! (and dad's too, don't think I've forgotten about ya ;) )

[D-pad]

I am proud to say my mom has been smackin the piss outa me since I was knee high and it puts a smile on her face everytime!

[Kustom]

Yes, and my daughter made all honors classes this year, got perfect scores on all her testing last year, has been playing cello for four years, is trying out for the cross country track team, is on a swim team, makes quilts and fleece blankets for Project Linus (http://www.projectlinus.org), gave all of her Christmas money last year to the International Red Cross for Tsunami relief efforts and spent all her allowance she saved this summer on toiletries for the Katrina evacuees staying at the DC Armory.

I get compliments from adults all the time telling me she's the only kid they know who says yes ma'am, no ma'am, yes sir, no sir, please, thank you and excuse me without prompting. When our neighbor's apartment burned down, she gave half of all her toys to the 6-year-old girl who lost all her toys.


OMG. This one is gonna become one very fucked up teenager ;)
Watch out!

[Praetorian]

Actually, I would not recommend hitting someone with glasses. It actually carries a heavier legal penalty than hitting someone without glasses (at least in the US it does).

And also, you run a chance of *severely* damaging the person's face (and your hand) with the glass.

Most spectacles are no longer made of glass but some kind of plastic that simply does not shatter.

[Collapse]

Bah. My parents hit me when I was young. No, I did not need some family aid or psychiatric help (they hit me to get my shit straight, not because they felt the urge to do it). Belts, rulers, books. Nothing too sadisitc like pour hot water whatsoever.

I'd do it, provided the reasons suited for hitting are reasonable.

[spaik]

Disciplining a child is a matter of ration, reason, and restraint. Whether or not you strike a child for discipline is not so much as issue as whether the punishment befits the 'crime', so to speak. Would I use physical means of discipline? If I felt it was justified and warranted, certainly. Would I beat my child for any misdemeanor and offense? I certainly hope not. Would cause severe harm to my child? Maybe if that was my only option to stop them from seriously injuring and maybe even taking someone's life or their own. I mean, seriously, the whole question was so open and general, and you can't account for every forseeable event, so I don't even see the reason for asking, other than to ask, "What are your feelings on physical discipline on a child? Under what circumstances, of any, would you resort to it?"

The woman thing is the same, though for me, a lot easier to answer. I mean, there's hitting, and there's fighting. I loathe fighting. I used to fight a lot when I was a kid. School, brother, whoever wanted to throw down, for whatever reason. I've grown out of it, like much of my childhood. There's better ways, and if pugilism is your thing, there are more sporting options available. When you are joking around and throwing playful shots, that's nothing. I'll throw them regardless of who it is, or what gender. It's a form of affection. Random short attacks, like a random kick or punch or some shit, perhaps due to an affront or out of anger? I wouldn't strike back, anyways. That's just gonna start a fight, and I'd rather talk than fight. Doesn't matter if it was a guy or girl. There's better options, and I'd rather walk away than throw down. I don't get wounded pride over trivial things, unlike in my past, and its better for both myself and the opposing party this way. Finally, if its a real fight, one that's unavoidable, I'm not pulling punches, period. If I'm fighting, then I'm fighting to win, I don't care what you got between your legs. I'm not going to be nice, honorable or pretty about it.

[Kass]

Because they were beaten as a kid.

The majority of them were not. Don't selectively quote to justify your position. The largest number of kids who were in trouble were NEVER disciplined in ANY way.

I'm raising a child. I've worked with the best of kids with the Scouts. I've worked with the worst in the juvenile justice system. More than any other group of kids, the ones who get in trouble are the ones whose parents never disciplined them, never told them no and never *did* anything and only *talked* to their kids. They had the worst attitudes, the least amount of compassion and were often very cruel because they just didn't care.

[D-pad]

The majority of them were not. Don't selectively quote to justify your position. The largest number of kids who were in trouble were NEVER disciplined in ANY way.
True Dat Kass.

[Joe]

I think disciplining a child is very much needed. And if I had a kid (And I won't), s/he deserved it, they'd get smacked. Disciplining children may seem like a cruel thing to do, but it's NEEDED. My generation SUCKS because parents use words, and not their hands, and by the time they do start spanking, it's too late, they're teenagers.

[jaychou]

white people... please beat your kids so they won't be social outcasts at the school playground!

"Ryan... go clean your room..."

"FU BITCH!"

hilarious haha

[Collapse]

white people... please beat your kids so they won't be social outcasts at the school playground!

"Ryan... go clean your room..."

"FU BITCH!"

hilarious haha


It's "GO TO HELL BITCH!"

Next time if you're going to quote something from "Just for Laughs", make it accurate.

[Jon885]

I agree that disciplining a child is very important, but I don't think it has to involve hitting the child. I wouldn't be able to strike a child, but that's just me. I think it's a matter of personal preference on how you discipline your child (within reason)

And just because a parent doesn't use physical punishment against their children doesn't mean the child is a spoiled brat. It is possible to set limits without striking the child.

[DarkFire168]

90% of America's youths problems come from the lack of discipline in their household. In this day and age of hyper liberalism and over politically correctness and (oog, yuck) feelings, little Tommy hasn't been told that shooting up a school of people he's angry at is a bad thing. So now all his emo/ska/goth/idiotic pretentiousness (or "No one understands me!" syndrome, rampant amongst blogs) builds up and he goes out and shoots someone. If people would just take some responsibility and teach their kids right from wrong, and for god fucking sakes DISCIPLINE THEM, life would be 10 times better here.

[Pfalzer]

What am i am 20 yes and i still say yes maam sir and etc. I dont even look adults lol (i might be considered an adult) in the eyes. Its hard for me to start conversations becuase i have the mentality that i cna only respond when others initiate conversation. I was spanked but not alot i can honestly remember maybe 10 spakings through my 20 years of life. My mother was a single parent . BUt i consider spanking a learning experiance. Its not as bad as some people think its usually done in 20 seconds 40 :confused: But if you have a brain usually u go through phases

Phase1= WTF was tht for
Phase2= God i want to kill her
Phase 3= Wow my arms and butt hurts like hell
Phase4= haha the belt marks raised
Phase5= Maybe i deserved it
Phase6= Ouch it stings when i touch it
Phase7= I peed my pants

You get the picture. THing is my mother is jamaican and german everyone says she has an accent i cant tell. But i can tell when she gets made. A slew of words fly out that i cant understand then i am physically engaged in the battle to save my ass. I described those events as D-day becuz u can go anywhere but to the firing squad in order to take the beach lol.

[eyez0nme]

Nice imagery there fellowr, do you ever plan to publish your writings?

[Jon885]

Darkfire you could be right. But I have to wonder about people like the BTK killer. Dennis Rader said he enjoyed getting spanked by his mother. Rader was disciplined and he still became a serial killer.

I'm not sure how the columbine shooters were raised so I'll look into it.

[Pfalzer]

Actually yes this poem i publishe dand by the end of the month ill find out if i won 1000 or the annual 10000 prize for it!

Tired One
The lonely steward of the tempest sorrow,
lowers his mirrored gaze from the sun.
Beaten and broken is his weary vessal and
long are the days he wants of none. Weighed
and Measured he has found no others tht can
understand his helm doned. Tired and
restless he lays in his bed of thorns.
Uneasy in rest an he is in life he waits
and wants of none. Cracked is the mask he
wears, streaked with the mirrors run. His
gaze is as deep as the seven leagues that
lay beneath this sun. He wants no end and
wants no start he wants nothing becuase
nothing cannot rot. So fanned will be his
anger and tanned will he become. Lowered
will his gaze stay as he travels under this
alien sun.


Jamie Craig Greenwood II

[Kass]

Darkfire you could be right. But I have to wonder about people like the BTK killer. Dennis Rader said he enjoyed getting spanked by his mother. Rader was disciplined and he still became a serial killer.

I'm not sure how the columbine shooters were raised so I'll look into it.

The parents of the Columbine shooters didn't know their kids wer collecting weapons and building bombs in their bedrooms and garages. How do you think they were raised? Their parents were more worried about "respecting their children's privacy" than parenting.

How the hell do you NOT know your kids are building bombs in your garage?

[Pfalzer]

True i would be all into my kids business not u know so they would know i am i would do it secretive like.

[Jon885]

Well either the parent's were "respecting their children's privacy" as you said or the shooters were too crafty for their parents to know.

I don't know though..in fact i haven't heard anything about their parenting from all of the coverage on it. I know a lot of people blame the parents but they never present any facts about how the shooters were raised.

none that i've heard anyway.

[Dead Sexy Vocab]

It's "GO TO HELL BITCH!"

Next time if you're going to quote something from "Just for Laughs", make it accurate.

Actually, he's right. Russell Peters says "Ryan, go clean your room..."
"... FUCK YOU, BITCH!" *hyperventilates*
"... What am I gonna do with him?" *shrugs*
"Ryan, man, you can't talk to your mom like that!"
"YES I CAN, SHE'S A JACKASS."
"Don't say that, man, or she'll hit you!"
"Noi she won't, she's not allowed to."
"What're you talking about, man? My parents beat me!"
"Yeah? Well the next time they do that, you tell them to FUCK OFF."