Fuck the motherfucking fucker

[Jay]

This move out of home thing isn't going AT ALL like I planned in my head.

The cunt I've been staying with - my best mate's mum - she isn't an alcy, but she likes her beer. A lot. She drinks a lot, and has her friends over drinking with her, and they're all happy and laughing.

Then she gets maggoted and goes to bed, and after that EVERYTHING we do is wrong, or bad. She yells and swears at my friend who in turn yells and threatens and punches walls back. I thought it was all fine and dandy... until the motherfucker took it out on ME and kicked me out.

See, I had a job for a little while, but the conditions were shit, and the guys were arseholes. The boss refused to tell me anything about the job - he expected me to just turn up there and work, without any details - and when I started nagging him on it he told me "right now, I could offer you my arse". So I said goodbye, seeya the fuck later. And quit.

So I started looking again, and last night she got on the beers with a friends... I'm minding my business and all of a sudden... cue everything being wrong, cue big fucking argument where holes get put in walls, cue her taking it out on me and saying if I don't have a job by today, I'm out... cue her changing her mind and saying she doesn't care, I can pack my shit and leave.

I used to think she was the bee's knees when I was a kid. Oh yeah, the Queen of fucking England. She was my best mate's mum, she took us places, she was cool... then I lived with her. Pathetic, alcoholic cuntface.

As of this second I'm typing from a computer while I'm waiting for someone to become available to talk with me about emergency accomodation.

What stupid, STUPID FUCKING IDEA convinced me I could ever have a life away from my parents' house?

So, fuck the motherfucking fucker. I hope she fucking burns in hell for this shit.

[Tibs]

omg hai jay

[Mechs]

Damn, thats messed up man. I guess you never really get to know a person unless you live with them. Hope you find someplace soon.

[Idlethought]

I've heard it alot where people who were once cool live together and all of a sudden hate each other down to the bone. Thats why you dont live with people you know =/

[Tibs]

Moving in with your girlfriend is always a good laugh. 8)

Go get one of those.

[erbiumfiber]

Can you get any kind of student loan and get into a school or training program? You remind me a lot of my brother- very bright but with no degree or particularly marketable skill. I supported him for a year while I sent him to air conditioning (HVAC) school. Now he makes good money and no longer takes crappy jobs beneath his skills with creepy people. He has a great position and a great boss who really appreciates him.

Does Australia have anything like JobCorps (a U.S. residential training program where you "earn while you learn" I think and then they help you find a decent job when you get out).

The best way to get out of your parents' house is by attending school or training of some type. Then you can at least have your own room in a dorm or something-makes all the difference in the world when it's your own place.

It took my brother nearly 20 years of crappy jobs before he got the training he needed (evictions, repossessions of cars, an arrest for no car insurance...). Don't go through that awful path. Australia must have SOMETHING for people like you- it's supposed to be the land of opportunity, like the US.

I wish you the best of luck- you're very smart, I'm sure you have it in you to get qualified for a decent job and get your own decent place and move on with your life.

[ruaidhri]

Jay, I totally agree with erbiumfiber. You are a very intelligent young man. Your problem is that you lack formal education. You need to correct that.

Although you certainly are intelligent enough, you don’t have to go to a regular college. Instead you could go to a technical or trade schools? Get a student loan and most of all finish your schooling. This is something that only you can do and you will be doing it for yourself.

Develop an action plan and make it happen.

Good luck.

[ID_10T]

Oh boo hoo. welcome to the real world
act like an idiot and youll pay

[D-pad]

^ Fuck him.

[PopCulturePooka]

Can you get any kind of student loan and get into a school or training program? You remind me a lot of my brother- very bright but with no degree or particularly marketable skill. I supported him for a year while I sent him to air conditioning (HVAC) school. Now he makes good money and no longer takes crappy jobs beneath his skills with creepy people. He has a great position and a great boss who really appreciates him.

Does Australia have anything like JobCorps (a U.S. residential training program where you "earn while you learn" I think and then they help you find a decent job when you get out).

The best way to get out of your parents' house is by attending school or training of some type. Then you can at least have your own room in a dorm or something-makes all the difference in the world when it's your own place.

It took my brother nearly 20 years of crappy jobs before he got the training he needed (evictions, repossessions of cars, an arrest for no car insurance...). Don't go through that awful path. Australia must have SOMETHING for people like you- it's supposed to be the land of opportunity, like the US.

I wish you the best of luck- you're very smart, I'm sure you have it in you to get qualified for a decent job and get your own decent place and move on with your life.

Jay, I totally agree with erbiumfiber. You are a very intelligent young man. Your problem is that you lack formal education. You need to correct that.

Although you certainly are intelligent enough, you don’t have to go to a regular college. Instead you could go to a technical or trade schools? Get a student loan and most of all finish your schooling. This is something that only you can do and you will be doing it for yourself.

Develop an action plan and make it happen.

Good luck.


I'll field both these.

Jay didn't finish high school IIRC.

Jays lives in a very country area.

Student loans don't really exist here except as schloarships or HECS. HECS is university only. For Uni you need good marks in grade 12.

We don't have dorms on campuses. Only some (usually private) Universities do, and they are pay up front. We call these places colleges. With no student loans existing, theres no dorming.

And most aussie students dont dorm. They share house. Like what Jay did. Which is a minefield. Or they study while living at home. I think about 50% at least of younger tertiary level students live at home.

Jay could go to TAFE, like a trade school. But needs to pay upfront pretty much. Theres not a huge range of options unless he has severe financial hardship, which I don't think he'd qualify for.

Most students here need to work while they study, especially if share housing. Even with government supplied rent assistance its very day to day living.

Jay needs to A) Find a place to live and B) a job at the same time to ensure rent money flows in and keeps him at the place. After a few weeks or months of that he could look at going to TAFE to get maybe an apprenticeship or diploma, but he'd need money up front for most courses.

While trying to find a job, he could go on the dole. Which is getting tough here. He needs to prove he has looked seriously for jobs, ANY jobs, each week. He needs to keep a diary showing at least 10 job contacts, interviews, applications etc a fortnight. If he doesnt it gets cut. Because he is rural, there may not be many jos in his town. If this is the case the government may deny him the dole unless he moves to an rea where there are jobs. Like a major city. Which means he needs somewhere to live. While on the dole, with no job, he'd need to sharehouse. Likely in a pretty grubby low income low working class area.

[Psychochink]

I took a year off between high school and uni. Got my place secured and then deferred it to take a break/work. I have to say, working the kind of jobs that you can get without any post-school qualifications is the single best motivator for getting a formal education that you can ever have.

If you're not cut out for uni, go to TAFE. The thing to remember is that, bitching of the masses about fees going up aside, we have one of the most affordable higher education systems in the world.

[The below is primarily for the information of the non-Aussies, as I'm sure Jay is well aware of it already.]

To give an example, if you were so inclined, you could get a four-year Engineering degree from Curtin for $28,000. Most others are cheaper. That amount could be completely covered by HECS, which has no loan fees and no interest rates other than indexation to CPI. You're not required to start repaying it until your taxable income goes past $38,000, at which point they'll take 4% to start paying it off.

While you're studying, you can get both Austudy and rent assistance, which you don't have to pay back, to an average tune of about $450/fortnight, further supplementable by part-time work which won't even affect your Austudy until you start earning more that about $130/week. That's more than enough to live on, with spending money, particularly in shared housing like most students (I should know).

If you need more than that for some reason, there's government student loans available.

[We now return to our regularly scheduled programming.]

A formal education, even if you go to TAFE, is effectively a requirement for most decent jobs these days. It lets employers know that you're both intelligent enough and motivated enough to get through it.

As far as moving out goes - moving in with your mate's mum was a bad idea in the first place. If you want to cut the apron strings, then cut them, don't transfer them. Go check the uni notice boards and move in with a bunch of students. Cheap and ususally decent company.

For the information of the Americans, the whole 'dorm' thing is the exception rather than the norm here - it's not part of our university culture. Most students tend to rent their own places if they're out of home.

[PopCulturePooka]

Does TAFE do HECS?

I also know HECS has been tougher to get on recently.


EDIT: Jays best bet may be too look at that New apprenticeships thing.

[Psychochink]

See, this is what comes of starting a post, then going to a meeting, and then finishing a post without refreshing the page. The 'good marks in grade 12' is debatable, mind you...

I just checked on that, and they don't. That having been said, Central TAFE (WA) has an absolute maximum tuition cost of $481.80/semester. Less if you qualify for Austudy, Youth Allowance or any other form of governmental assistance.

Yeah, they're pushing the apprenticeships these days. It really depends on what he wants to do with his life.

[erbiumfiber]

My brain hurts with the acronyms. OK, living at school is out. Living with fellow students is in. (I have done both during university). Assuming that the numbers you are quoting are Australian dollars, that's pretty damn cheap. I spent nearly $20,000 (US) on tuition/supplies alone for my brother's 14 or 15 month course.

Is Australia like the UK where you can apply as a "mature student" and your school grades don't count as much? I guess you need to be 21 or so and I get the impression Jay isn't quite there yet.

The rural part is a bit difficult. I grew up in a town on Long Island whose economy was depressed for about my whole childhood. I grew up knowing I would have to leave after high school. My friends that stayed did not do well financially (two bankruptcies for one of them).

What is this apprentice program of which you speak? Sounds like a viable option at least for the short term to GET AWAY FROM HOME. Getting away from home changes everyone's life. Apprenticeship, maybe not so great housing, but at least you're on your own. And that's a great feeling. If the government is overseeing the apprenticeship, hopefully the jobs don't completely suck.

In the US we have loans for everything: college, trade school, etc. Hell, you can even get a credit card and use that to pay. I'm sorry to hear that Jay doesn't have as many opportunities. And to penalize him for living in a rural area with fewer job opportunities is pretty painful. Still, TAFE seems affordable so if it offers a course that Jay likes, he could ditch the apprenticeship (or can he work that and do TAFE at night? We have A LOT of night programs in the US).

There's gotta be a way out of this. Relatives in a big city to help get him started (stay with them 2 weeks, get into a program, move out)? Hell, I sold my soul to the Air Force to get the hell out when I was 18 (they paid my way through 3 years of university). No regrets. Living at home and going to the local state school was more than I could bear.

Edit: Also, I wasn't too keen on engineering school but I went because 1. the Air Force would pay for it and 2. engineers make a good living. I figured I would do it until I got sick of it and then go on to graduate school for something else. This plan worked out when I got a job at the Patent Office and then they paid for law school (which I went to at night). The point is to pick SOMETHING, even if it's not your heart's desire, just for the money, initially. Once you're earning a good a steady paycheck, you can always go back and pursue your dream. People with rich parents get to pursue the dream immediately.

Well, we're rooting for you Jay. It sounds like you're in a tight spot but I think you'll work something out.

[fa11en87]

You're back I see. =( Don't know anything about Australia.><

[CrazyAce86]

Sorry, amigo.

*e-hug*

I don't have much to offer in the way of options. I can barely understand the US's school system, I'm no good with any other countries.

I can tell you that this sounds like the worst-- so it has to get better from here on out. Does Australia have something like Craig's List? You might find a place to stay and a job there. Is there something like a GED you could get that would take place of a diploma? That might help, too.

I hope everything works out, amigo!

[ruaidhri]

Jay, there is a way out of your problem. You have to take charge of your life. You have to develop a workable plan with lots of small steps that you can achieve. Execution is the key to success. You no longer can put it off until tomorrow.

I suggest you start off learning a trade that can provide the money you’ll need to live comfortably. Then, if you want, you can go back to school for more academic knowledge. Later, a further academic education could make you more desirable to employers but right now, today, your needs are lot more basic. First you need a decent paying job, a place to stay, clothing and food.

Yes, Australia is different from the United States. But, if you put your mind to it you can work the system to your advantage. Always remember that everything you do or don’t do is an action. That’s right, doing nothing is an action because it has an effect. Consider how you’ll feel in 20, 30, 40 years if you do nothing and that’s what you get, nothing but grief throughout your life. You are 19 years old. Now’s the time to set the course for the rest of your life.

You have a lot of supporters here on OP9. They have faith in you. Now, it’s time for you to have faith in yourself.

[Orclover]

If you were in the states I would suggest joining the Marines. But your not.

So I suggest you move to the United States, And join the Marines when you get here.

[Ceirnian]

Then she gets maggoted and goes to bed, and after that EVERYTHING we do is wrong, or bad. She yells and swears at my friend who in turn yells and threatens and punches walls back. I thought it was all fine and dandy... until the motherfucker took it out on ME and kicked me out.

In the future don't invite friends over who will do stupid things like this, also when you get into an arguement don't punch holes into walls. That isn't going to make anything better. You should slap your friends for threatening her and getting 'all up in her face'. Of course she's going to take it out on you, they are your responsibility when they come over.

As for the rest, others are giving good information so good luck with your job search.

[erbiumfiber]

I think the "friend" is the son of the mother and lives there so there's not much Jay can do about their relationship...

[Ceirnian]

Oh wow everything makes sense now, I just read it wrong. That must be a shitty situation to be in, the scapegoat :(

[Loc]

Sorry to hear it's messed up mate, good luck with it all though, some good advice in this thread :)

[jihei18]

I am so sorry about your trouble. I hope everything works out.

[Masa the Masta]

Man, that sucks Jay.

Just know as a fellow woman pleaser, I'm here for ya. I'm glad we've heard from you, but we'll offer support buddy. Do your best.

[bigmouthstrikesagain]

I thought living in a shared house in Australia would be just like that movie (and book) He died with a felafel in his hand and that movie was hilarious but I guess I was wrong. No wait, the characters in that movie did have shitty lives so I'm right.

[Beowulf]

Just because you know someone well DOES NOT mean you should live with them. The person you know and the person they are at home are two completely different people.

[Decade]

I'm actually really worried bout Jay now since I know he wont be able to post again till he can find another place to live, and everyday he doesnt post may mean he hasnt found one yet :(

[Jay]

Alright, it's all done and dusted now. Basically I'm now living in a YMCA. Bed, shower, electricity, storage in your room, that's it. But hey, a bed for the night and some food in my belly, that's all I ask for.

I didn't expect anything in regards to the original post, I just had to blow off some steam. :D It's all good now.

Living on my own, in the city, so early in this venture. This is... sweet!

I'm not holding a grudge anymore. Being dumped upon just because I walked away from a shit job, it's all part of the deal this early in, I guess. Shit happens, eh?

[Jay]

Oh yeah...

I think the "friend" is the son of the mother and lives there so there's not much Jay can do about their relationship...

No. The mother invites HER friends around to get on the slops, and then when various friends have disappeared for the night, she gets her knickers in a twist about everything - bad drunk, I guess. So she starts yelling at my mate - her son - so he obviously feels victimised and starts yelling back, and it turns into an all in brawl with threats, etc. After one of these one morning, she took her shittiness out on me and said that if I haven't found another job by that day, I was out. Then at roughly 7am the same day, she told me she's changed her mind and I can pack my shit and leave.

So I told her what I thought of her. Simply, that I used to love her and now living with her I know what she really is - a pathetic alcoholic.

[ruaidhri]

Jay, the point I and other made still stands. Everything you do or don’t do is an action with consequences. Personally, I believe you have tremendous potential. You are intelligent and passionate. What you are not is formally educated. That is vitally necessary if you don’t want to suffer the consequences of moving from one “shit” job to another throughout your life.

You are 19 years old. All it takes is commitment to make your life better. Explore going to school for either an academic degree or trade knowledge. Be practical about what you need to make a living and having a comfortable and happy life. Don’t get caught up in dreams without a reasonable expectation of fulfillment. Later, you could always return to school for a more fulfilling education that could at that time, with your other acquired knowledge, propel you even further.

I read your posts. I know you are intelligent. Do something for yourself.

[shimanotaka]

Just spinning onwards on this education thing. If one is not the school type, is it possible to get apprenticeships in Australia? Spend a few years learning a trade and get paid for it, although the wages are probably quite crappy. Still it would be a job AND an education.

[erbiumfiber]

Oh yeah...



No. The mother invites HER friends around to get on the slops, and then when various friends have disappeared for the night, she gets her knickers in a twist about everything - bad drunk, I guess. So she starts yelling at my mate - her son - so he obviously feels victimised and starts yelling back, and it turns into an all in brawl with threats, etc. After one of these one morning, she took her shittiness out on me and said that if I haven't found another job by that day, I was out. Then at roughly 7am the same day, she told me she's changed her mind and I can pack my shit and leave.

So I told her what I thought of her. Simply, that I used to love her and now living with her I know what she really is - a pathetic alcoholic.


Australian vs. American English. The mate (friend) is the son of the mother, not someone you invited into the house. I think my meaning was understood as the post following mine indicates.

See how great it is to be on your own? Dorm room, YMCA, who cares as long as it's your OWN PLACE. You can probably fund said place with very little money, get on your feet and get a job/training/apprenticeship whatever. Listen to the lyrics of the YMCA song- it's really true. It's a place to get back on your feet; I'm sure the songwriter had some personal experience.

So are you in a new city, away from your hometown? This would be a big plus- more opportunities, fresh start, etc. I'm really happy for you- now go out and make a great life for yourself.

[Urban~Ninja]

One of my friends had a similiar experience, he had a arguement with his parents about something very stupid, and they kicked him straight out, withdrew him from the school he was attending and then cancelled his Phone, and his bank card, they left him high and dry with no way of getting anything.

He now lives in oen of those Refuges on the other side of Sydney, and is doing a cabniet making appreintence thing, he is going to finish it and then move on to doing mechanics at TAFE from what ive been told, hopefully get a job at a Garage and make some cash.

I would say your best bet Jay is to invest your time in looking for Apprentice positions where ever able, and try to land a job no matter what the pay is like (well, try to get more then 10 a Hour) and then i would recomment looking for a place to live, try to find one of those "3 people looking for 4th room-mate." places so you can split the rent and possibly only pay for your food. If not that then you can also look towards the Dole, $200 a week, kinda shit way to live though. You could come down to Duntrune in the Sydney area and become a officer in the Army?

[yogi]

This only applies if you don't like blue collar shitty trade jobs. Where the dick jokes fly and every meals a meat pie.

If thats the case I have to second the education thing. I dropped out of school, did nothing much for 3 years then went back thru tafe. now Im at uni and have found something Im actually interested in, Languages. I dont have it as tough as you but I have worked blue collar jobs (+ shitty hospitality jobs.. it makes you into a smoker) and wasnt impressed. My goal is to be self employed in the end, Just like freelance style work. Anyway good luck.

If all else fails become a busker.

[PopCulturePooka]

Hospitality jobs in Brisbane, even worse...

People up here have become ruder n ruder.

[mugen]

One of my friends had a similiar experience, he had a arguement with his parents about something very stupid, and they kicked him straight out, withdrew him from the school he was attending and then cancelled his Phone, and his bank card, they left him high and dry with no way of getting anything.

WTF? kicking him out is one thing, but withdrawing him from school? Was it justified?

Sorry for getting off-topic.

[PopCulturePooka]

WTF? kicking him out is one thing, but withdrawing him from school? Was it justified?

Sorry for getting off-topic.
I'd say he was being sent to a private school, and parents were paying big bucks to send him there.

If he was no longer welcome at home, they probably wouldnt want to be paying for his expensive school.

[Urban~Ninja]

I'd say he was being sent to a private school, and parents were paying big bucks to send him there.

If he was no longer welcome at home, they probably wouldnt want to be paying for his expensive school.

Yeah he was going to a 10k a year school, so pulling him out was a good idea, his original plan once he got kicked out was to sleep in the schools always open DnT rooms but when he rocked up after the weekend of staying at peeps houses he was informed by his tutor that he was nolonger a student at the school.

[Jay]

Jay, the point I and other made still stands. Everything you do or don’t do is an action with consequences. Personally, I believe you have tremendous potential. You are intelligent and passionate. What you are not is formally educated. That is vitally necessary if you don’t want to suffer the consequences of moving from one “shit” job to another throughout your life.

You are 19 years old. All it takes is commitment to make your life better. Explore going to school for either an academic degree or trade knowledge. Be practical about what you need to make a living and having a comfortable and happy life. Don’t get caught up in dreams without a reasonable expectation of fulfillment. Later, you could always return to school for a more fulfilling education that could at that time, with your other acquired knowledge, propel you even further.

I read your posts. I know you are intelligent. Do something for yourself.

Putting money aside for just that right now, brother. :D

It's going to be a bit of a wait though, as most TAFE campuses (http://www.tafe.wa.gov.au/) in the city have a waiting list.

And I didn't mean to sound like a little boy about this so-called "shit" job. But when someone says they can offer me their arse, well... they can shove it up theirs. :D

[Urban~Ninja]

Good to see your looking at TAFE.

Best of luck to you, Jay my Australian Homie G who is actually on the western side.

[Plekto]

Leaving sounds like a good plan. Just do it now.

Oh, and yes, she's an alcoholic. Everything you mentioned fits the pattern.

EDIT: About the job - I keep mentioning it, but it takes absolutely no skills other than basic high school level education and maybe some computer skills - to do quality control for data forensics and legal processing. $12-14 an hour to start isn't bad. You sit at a computer running batches and processing data all day long. It's not great, but it pays the bills. I can't think of anytihng that pays more to start for as little work.
Of course managing the projects and so on takes some skill and pays a lot more, which is why I keep the job - heh.

http://www.fadv.com/LitigationConsulting/index.html
We were bought out a year ago by this mega-corp. But it's stil the same - lawyers need data processed NOW and pay 5-8 cents a PAGE for it. If you are fast and have good eyes/reflexes, this is a good first job. Or second, in fact. If you are in California, our company is hiring as well. Or just do a job search for "Discovery Cracker" or "E-Discovery". The first is the program most companies use, and the other is the specific field. It should be called "E-Scaning", though, as that's a more accurate description.

The other way to make a decent living is - well you're young. the IBEW will pay you over $12 an hour to start and after five years, you'll be making over $35 an hour. Free medical, union stabiity, free education and classes, as well as a pension program that's rock-solid. The perfect job for a 19 year old who needs to make it on his own. If you don't have big computer skills or fantastic dexterity, this is for you.

http://www.ibew.org/union/index.htm
Note - if you want to do AV/low voltage work, this is the union that many states require you to go through. So it's not all residential and high-rise anymore. It pays a bit less, but it's not bad, all things considered.

Both are much better than Taco-Hell or getting shot at in the Army. I'm amazed at the peole who complain about the job market. There are much better than minimum wage jobs that anyone can do. In fact, the IBEW is looking for members - it's a bit short these days in many cities.

[ruaidhri]

Jay,

As I expected you're taking your future seriously. I know it won't be easy and I know it won't bear fruit overnight but most of all I know that you will be successful.

Sometimes it take a few shit jobs to wake a person up to what's necessary to get ahead in this world. You're lucky because you have what education can't teach, common sense. With the formal education and the proper accredidations I believe you will craft your own future and it will be bright. Whatever you do don't allow temporary obstructions to block your path.

[Plekto]

AH. my bad. Australia. I'm sure they have unions and simmilar jobs there as well. Makes money fast, and the faster you get money.. the faster you can go to school :)