Need some help

[General_Admission]

Today I decided to call this girl who I thought really liked me. Last year when I asked her and her 2 friends collectively if they wanted to go to the movies in a heart beat she said 'YES!' with a huge smile, while the other girls gave her this embarrassed look. For reasons I do not want to go into b/c it is boring, I couldn't go. She moved here about 4-5 years ago from China. I always thought she had some kind of crush on me. In fact, I think I'm the reason why she broke up with her bf.

So I got her # today & called it because I wanted to invite her to the movies with my friends but I couldn't find her due to the power going out at school and thus a weird dismisal system from school. When I called I got her mom. I knew this would happen because she has band after school. After struggling with English with her mom she finally understood to have her daughter call me back when she got home. The conversation with the girl went something like this:

GA = my name
G = girl
Any names you see are made up.

One thing to know about her:
When she talks to me w/o her friends she has a panic attack & will actually call after them to not leave her. She struggles between staying with me or catching up with her friends. She has alwasy been very nice to me and smiles and such as we pass and always looks for me.

G: Hello, GA?
GA: hello, who is this?
G: This is Vicky
GA: Ah yes, I talked to your mom earlier. Thought you weren't supposed to be home till later?
G: We were let out early.
GA: Thats's nice. Hey, I was wondering if you would like to go to the movies with me and some friends?
G: Who are the friends?
GA: Kate, Beth, and Lindsey? You know them right?
G: I know Beth and Lindsey.
GA: So you want to come?
*we talk about the details & I tell her it's happening tonight, which she didn't know*
G: I just got back from band. I am sort of tired.
GA: How about some other time.
G: ok.
GA: We could schedule it at school next week.
G: Will Kate, Beth, and Lindsey be coming too.
GA: No, it will just be us.
*from now on G is extremely flustered. Add many 'oooohhh's and pant like noises & pauses...just imagine some Chinese girl very flustered*
G: Like on a date?
GA: yeah. Just you and me.
<I forget what she says here...skiping ahead a few lines>
G: I have a bf.
GA: oh, I didn't know? I thought you had broken up with Kile some time ago?
G: Yes, but I have a new bf now.
GA: Oh......Does he go to our school?
G: No...he doesn't go to our school.
GA: Does he go to *insert school name*?
G: No, he goes to *insert other school name*.
*Don't remember how it went but somehow she tells me she's not so sure*
GA: So you have a bf now, eh?
G: well yes...no...I don't know.
GA: What do you mean you don't know?
G: I don't know....well I talked to him over the summer.
GA: So you just talked?
G: yes.
GA: So is he your bf or not?
*long pause...she is extremely flustered now*
G: ...I don't know...
*I say something that I don't remember*
GA: Well just remeber that you can always come to me.
G: ok, I will keep that in mind...How about we go to the movies with *insert her 2 best friends' names here*
GA: ok sure, we can set it up when we see each other at school.
*phone call ends soon after*

My question is why is she not so eager to go to the movies like she was before? Does she really like this bf or was it just an excuse? Is she just nervous about going to a movie with just me and wants her friend's to come along too? The first time I aked her to go to the movies it was a collective tthing involving her and her friends so maybe that's why it was easy for her to say yes?

I need you guys' input here? Help!

Also, if this guy is a potential bf for her I might implement this strategy:

Read the second post & last post. They go together and it is what I want to do if it comes to it: http://www.girlfriendstealer.com/index.php?name=News&new_topic=4

[h2orowe]

I think she probably liked you, but than found a new guy she liked.

[General_Admission]

^ Then why didn't she just say no. I have a bf.

My heart just fell when I read that...

[h2orowe]

Heh, I'm sorry man, just hope for the best, good luck with her.

[General_Admission]

Well, I'll just have to steal her back then.

I mean all she is doing is talking to the guy.

I need to build the tension. That bitch is mine. :cool:

For now we are friends whith me giving off vibes. Never too friendly. I have to have the "I don't care that much attitude." :D

"All is fair in love and war"

[Myrsilus]

I agree man... She might have a boyfriend right now, but when a girl reacts like that it could mean she is still harboring some sort of attraction for you.

Be subtle about it, but do pursue it.

[Shamu]

Sounds like she might still like you, but also likes this new guy. OR she's making the new BF up, because she's nervous about what her friends might think (I know, it shouldn't matter, but we girls can be real catty bitches when we're trying to fit in) and maybe they don't approve of you for some reason?
As for her wanting her friends around, most of us girls are like that at that age. Heck most of us are still like that. We take comfort in groups, not sure why we do it, but don't necessarily take it as she doesn't want to be alone with you at all.
It sounds like you're on the right track with her though. Let her know that she can come to you if she wants. But don't sit around waiting for her, unless you really think that you could have something special with her.
Good luck sweetie! :)

[Benaire]

Drug her and then drag her to a cabin somewhere in the mountains while muttering things like "I am the only one who can truly understand you", "I love you and i wont let anyone hurt you" and "No one can love you as much as i can love you".

Once you have her in your cabin disable your car and baby her like feeding her with a spoon etc.

[General_Admission]

If I wanted to be sneaky I could try to get ehr friend's # and ask them if Vicky has a bf!

But, then again, Vicky may have called them as soon as I hung up and told them about it.

Should I call Vicky tomorrow and try to set-up the movies thing with her friends for that night or let the idea of me liking her cook for a while in her head?

[koku]

umm if you ask her friends they will for sure tell her and she'll know you didnt trust her.

uh...incase you don't know friends/best friends talk. Their like a second and third pair of eyes and ears. And that's even if they tell you the truth or lie for her.

:P

Looks like to me, she did/does like you, but isn't too sure as to what to do. Just do what you can during your time of fame. Do things in ways she feels comfortable but I would still be a little pressuring about it. I stress a little and I stress the world pressure.

You figure out the rest.

[General_Admission]

*snip*
Remember Trent Reznor's words: "Nothing quite like the feel of something new". There IS a sexual aspect of this for her, maybe more than you realize. If you sense that you have some pretty good physical chemistry going on, enhance it: DON'T hug her, don't touch her, don't even do "accidental" touching while you're sitting next to each other in the movie theater. Let the tension build. And build. And build. Meanwhile, hug other female friends in front of her.

Say you're both driving in the car, and a particularly relevant/melodramatic song comes on the radio, like "Something I can Never Have" by Nine Inch Nails. (Don't diss me, I like NIN.) IMMEDIATELY fall silent. Increase the volume slightly. Look solemn and tragic. Avoid looking directly at her. If she really wants you, she will become totally silent too, and this giant writhing ball of tension will build up in the car between you until the next song comes on.
*snip*


I know it sounds cheesy, but I really want to do this. On problem is that the song she suggests is a little too dark and doesn't have very good vocals, sound, or lyrics. If any of you could please give me some suggestions it would be much appreciated. Thanks in advance! :D

[CNagy]

Annie Lennox - Love Song for a Vampire.

It has a hint of tragedy and sadness amidst the beauty.

[General_Admission]

Alright I do not want to become this girls' friend. To counter this I came up with an idea on what to do when I see her at school on Monday.

When I meet her I bring up the movie and say 'we are going together right.' She will respond with something like 'no, can we just go as friends. I have a bf.' Or something like that. When she says this I will simply refuse! We are going together bitch! She will then bring up about how she has this bf or something. Then I will say, 'I know you have this guy, but you are only talking to him. I go to the same school as you and am openly in love with you. Im sure your guy might be angry or upset, but I would too in his position.' If she says no, I need to pretend like I am really upset and pissed at her & just walk away.

I predict that somewhere in this she will try to walk away.

Any ideas or coments on this? How do I keep her from walking away?

I cannot enter the FZ!

[akitaka]

You're entering the "Friend Zone" based on the fact that you're showing quite a good sum of affection, I think. The quote in your previous post is just another method of indifferent attraction; subversive, but effective. Maybe you could just ignore the "come as a friend" portion, and simply bring her along, while keeping the tone neutral. She may feel uncomfortable, though, so, no sneaky moves.
You've shown yourself as a decent guy already, so I don't think you have to go all lovey-dovey and state all the "advantages" of being a couple with you; her mixed signals seem to already know.

I still can't think of a suitable song, however. Sorry, chief.

[General_Admission]

^ I'm thinking of just playing

'99 red balloons' by Goldfinger
'Extraordinary Girl' by Green Day
'Give Me Novacaine' by Green Day
& maybe "whatsername' by Green Day

[paul]

I've actually seen this situation on multiple occassions. The most common occurance is she is in a sort of relationship, but it is the beginning. And they have not "officially" started with the whole bf/gf thing, mostly its due to the guy in the relationship. Before meeting my girlfriend, I've always thought I wouldn't have the typical stereotype of not being able to commit in me, but how wrong I was. Being considerate, it wasn't easy to commit to being anyone's "boyfriend".

Chances are she is in a relationship with him, but he hasn't come around to committing yet.

I suppose if you wanna act, don't be indecisive and wishy washy, because that will only give him time to commit, and if you like her and she's chinese, this means she will not have anything to do with you other than being friends once he does commit to the relationship.

But eh, if you stand by the moral: "never tap another man's booty", then I'd say look somewhere else.

[General_Admission]

^ check your pm box.

Also, what do I do if she says she just wants to go as freinds but is obviously flustered again?

Maybe do what I said above?

[paul]

Firstly, the term love shouldn't be used so lightly. I was dating for more than a year before I could come close to saying it, and that came after alot of thought, because its not something to be said lightly

Secondly, depending on what kind of a person she is, and her exact feelings towards you, there can be mixed responses. Which is why I personally suggest you actually have a serious conversation with her to find out exactly what her situation is and what her feelings are. From there you can procede MUCH easier.

Thirdly, I don't reccommend having a movie as a first date, because you'll be concentrating on the movie and not each other. Do something that will allow you guys to talk. Maybe go to the park and coffee or w/e. It might not sound like your usual idea of a date, but IMO it is better.

Lastly, think about everything you say before you say it, and you'll be much better off. Communication is important :eek:

[caseylim]

I think she had a crush on the other guy, she's not sure of her feeling though. I also think she do like you abit cause she's friendly with you.

Since she's not so stable at this point, I think just relax and keep on normal terms. Making drastic approach is quite risky but there's chance.

[Jay]

I don't mean to pick apart your post, but...

I think she had a crush on the other guy

From the sound of the converastion it sounds like the other guy just got in first and she didn't know GA liked her.

...or she knew and deliberately chose the other guy over GA, which would suck. (Sorry dude, had to vocalise it.)

she's not sure of her feeling though.

From the sounds of the conversation it sounds like she's interested in him and she became flustered because he put her under mild pressure and she may have felt the need to justify her actions.

I also think she do like you abit cause she's friendly with you.

I have a lot of female friends, it doesn't mean they're all... wait. YOU have female friends, right? It doesn't mean they're into you just because they're friendly with you.

Since she's not so stable at this point, I think just relax and keep on normal terms.

No, wait.

Making drastic approach is quite risky but there's chance.

I'm kinda thinking this IS the time to go into damage control mode. If I was GA I'd tell her that I had feelings for her, however small or large, and that I'd like to get into something longer term with her. She doesn't have to make a decision *RIGHT NOW*, but that's the way he feels and he can't just switch off those feelings.

You might get let down hard, bro, but you have to know for certain right?