DragonSama
08-24-2005, 07:41 PM
I have been asked a couple of questions in regards to part 1 so I will address those now.
1. “You did not tell a Chinese military girl to fuck 18 generations of her ancestors and called her a bitch did you? I mean this is the Chinese military here they shoot people for less than that”
Yes I did tell her that. She was so stunned by it and her co worker was laughing so hard at her they had no time to react at all. By the time they came too I was already running (yes literally running) to my plane.
2. you’re wife’s name is not really Sku is?”
No it is not. For her sake I am using a nick name she used on AIM a few years back. And NO she does not use AIM anymore at all. And NO I am not going to tell you what it was and No I am not going to tell you her real name.
Now on with the show.
The next day after arriving in Shanghai I slept until 3 in the afternoon. My mother and father in-law swore I had slipped into a comma and said they had poked me with sticks and I just kind of grumbled and roll over. They weren’t sure if IW as alive, asleep, in a coma or if their daughter had married a bear that had went into hibernation.
Sku was up and running around her usual chipper self. So I rolled out of bed said Hi and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and do the usual morning routine. (Only at 3 in the afternoon). After that it was time for the biggest game of Telephone I had ever played. It consisted of me talking to Sku, Sku talking to her parents, then her parents talking to her, then her talking to me.
Mother/Father In law (in Chinese): What did you think of your first flight to China?
Sku: They want to know your opinion on your first flight to China?
Me: Oh I think you know what I’m going to say here. The flight was awful the plane ride sucked, we got no food on the way form America to China, the Airport girl was a bitch. So yea the flight here sucked but I’m glad I’m here
Sku (in Chinese): He said the flight was OK
So after the Meet the parent’s scenario was over we went out for a bit. They decided to take me to the Shanghai T.V. Station that night. Because you know All Americans do is watch T.V. anyways so the most appropriate place to take one is to a T.V. Studio. So we take a boat across the river to the TV tower. Now when I say T.V. tower I don’t mean an office building type thing. No this is more like a huge metal structure with 2 balls on it. It was pretty cool looking
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v93/dragonsama/shanghai20tv20tower.jpg
When we get there the tours of the place were over but you cold freely walk about the place. So we go into the base of it and take the short elevator to the first ball where the T.V. studios are. The elevators of this place have girls (once again super model looking girls) who stand in there and their job is to push the elevator button to the floors. Never mind that the 6 elevators only go to certain places. One set goes to ball 1 and one set goes to ball 2. Also I would imagine you would have a major case of elevator head after work that day. The neat thing was all the studios had windows where you could look in on them while they were making T.V. shows. Although the only thing we saw was the nightly news being broadcast.
So we hop back down to the ground level to take the elevator to Ball 2. Yes that is right in order to go from one ball to the next you had to return to the ground level. So we get on the elevator and the elevator girl starts talking about something in Chinese. The second she finished she turned to me and in English started talking about the elevator and how fast it would go form the ground floor to the second ball. She told me that it went 7 meter per second and that we were going up about 402 meters (about ¼ mile) in about 58 seconds. Man I want one of these in every building back home because it take 2 minute to go up 10 floors in any office building I have been in. The whole time she was talking in English to me (as I was the only non Asian person in the elevator) I looked right in her eyes and smiled. And she was blushing so hard that she turned a bright shade of red and kind of turned and tried to hide her face in the elevator after her speech. Yea I still got it.
We got out on ball number two and looked around the little museum they had set up. My father in law mentioned that the helped design all the construction equipment that they used to build the place. I looked out the big windows to see the view of the entire city It was absolutely a beautiful the bund reminded me of a very European city while downtown had the feel of a New York city or Tokyo with many neon signs flashing advertisements for everything from Fuji Camera to Toto toilets yet if you looked out another side you could see an much older part of Shanghai with many more building that looked more traditional in style. I will say shanghai is a city that offers a lot of contrast in a very compact area.
As were we waiting for the elevator to come pick us up there was a small stand that was selling little crystal models of the T.V. tower. As I looked for one the lady tried to sell me a model of the US capitol building. Ok if it wasn’t funny enough that a woman working in a Chinese T.V. tower is trying to sell an American a model of a building in their home country for a price higher than I could buy one here for. Because you know Americans go to other countries to buy souvenirs of things that are in America. I mean why else do we travel abroad? To make matters even funnier they had messed the name up as well. She was trying to sell me a model of “The U.S. parliament building”. Umm no thanks I’ll take the little crystal statue of this place.
We boarded the elevator and the same girl was running it. She turned that same bright shade of red in front of me. The funny part of this was that when we got off she waved and then looked at me and winked. Whoa baby I am already taken here but it’s good to know I can still pull em in.
Another fairy ride across the river and we decided now it was time to eat. My father in law said he knew of a good place to go eat ad we started walking over there. As we did some guy started to walk next to him and tried to convince him to go to some other restaurant. I felt bad for the poor guy as Father in law pretty much ignored him even up to the door of the place we were going to.
It was a nice place and we were seated right away. They handed out the menu and it was all in Chinese. As I looked over it Sku turned to me and said ”don’t worry about what is on there dad is ordering dinner tonight”. No worries right? Well I was a little tired still from the jet lag so I was a little out of it as Sku and her parents talked I didn’t need to pay that much attention as they were all talking in Chinese. The next thing I saw was a Snake being flung onto the table. I’m not talking some little garden snake. No I’m talking about a big round 7 foot long snake. It was in fishnet style sake and it was slithering everywhere. My initial reaction was WTF is this?!?!?!? I jumped back and was thinking “Awe hell no they didn’t bring me here for dinner they brought me here to be dinner for this thing”. Then I started to grab a knife and as I was going in for the kill they took it away. Thank god. I asked Sku what the hell that was about. She told me “they wanted to be sure it was big enough”. “Big enough for what?” I asked “Big enough for the 4 of us” I asked her “what is this? Restaurant and a pet shop? And why would your folks want a snake. Heck I’ll be glad to get them a gerbil or something” she told me “no silly that snake IS dinner”. I asked her if they do this all the time and she told me “well normally they don’t but dad asked to see it before they cooked it”. Gee thanks Dad when you come to America I will; make it a point to make you do a running of the bulls before I cook you that stake on the grill.
Then I took in what I was just told “wait a second I am going to be eating a snake? I might live in Texas now but I am from Peoria IL the only people I ever heard of eating snake was Jesse James, and some rednecks in the trailer park in west Texas and Arizona. There is no way in hell I am eating this” Sku told me “Don’t be rude this kind of thing is expensive here and besides it is supposed to be really good”. I figured I would give this a shot and if it tasted bad I would pick at it and just starve myself until I could get more normal food.
They did the Iron Chef thing with the snake I mean there was snake in everything, Snake soup, Snake dumpling, deep fried Snake, Snake and vegetable stir fry and a snake in some sweet soup desert. Surprisingly it wasn’t too bad at all. I didn’t think you could make that thing taste good.
After dinner we went home and it was bed time. And I was definitely on my guard after that.
1. “You did not tell a Chinese military girl to fuck 18 generations of her ancestors and called her a bitch did you? I mean this is the Chinese military here they shoot people for less than that”
Yes I did tell her that. She was so stunned by it and her co worker was laughing so hard at her they had no time to react at all. By the time they came too I was already running (yes literally running) to my plane.
2. you’re wife’s name is not really Sku is?”
No it is not. For her sake I am using a nick name she used on AIM a few years back. And NO she does not use AIM anymore at all. And NO I am not going to tell you what it was and No I am not going to tell you her real name.
Now on with the show.
The next day after arriving in Shanghai I slept until 3 in the afternoon. My mother and father in-law swore I had slipped into a comma and said they had poked me with sticks and I just kind of grumbled and roll over. They weren’t sure if IW as alive, asleep, in a coma or if their daughter had married a bear that had went into hibernation.
Sku was up and running around her usual chipper self. So I rolled out of bed said Hi and went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and do the usual morning routine. (Only at 3 in the afternoon). After that it was time for the biggest game of Telephone I had ever played. It consisted of me talking to Sku, Sku talking to her parents, then her parents talking to her, then her talking to me.
Mother/Father In law (in Chinese): What did you think of your first flight to China?
Sku: They want to know your opinion on your first flight to China?
Me: Oh I think you know what I’m going to say here. The flight was awful the plane ride sucked, we got no food on the way form America to China, the Airport girl was a bitch. So yea the flight here sucked but I’m glad I’m here
Sku (in Chinese): He said the flight was OK
So after the Meet the parent’s scenario was over we went out for a bit. They decided to take me to the Shanghai T.V. Station that night. Because you know All Americans do is watch T.V. anyways so the most appropriate place to take one is to a T.V. Studio. So we take a boat across the river to the TV tower. Now when I say T.V. tower I don’t mean an office building type thing. No this is more like a huge metal structure with 2 balls on it. It was pretty cool looking
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v93/dragonsama/shanghai20tv20tower.jpg
When we get there the tours of the place were over but you cold freely walk about the place. So we go into the base of it and take the short elevator to the first ball where the T.V. studios are. The elevators of this place have girls (once again super model looking girls) who stand in there and their job is to push the elevator button to the floors. Never mind that the 6 elevators only go to certain places. One set goes to ball 1 and one set goes to ball 2. Also I would imagine you would have a major case of elevator head after work that day. The neat thing was all the studios had windows where you could look in on them while they were making T.V. shows. Although the only thing we saw was the nightly news being broadcast.
So we hop back down to the ground level to take the elevator to Ball 2. Yes that is right in order to go from one ball to the next you had to return to the ground level. So we get on the elevator and the elevator girl starts talking about something in Chinese. The second she finished she turned to me and in English started talking about the elevator and how fast it would go form the ground floor to the second ball. She told me that it went 7 meter per second and that we were going up about 402 meters (about ¼ mile) in about 58 seconds. Man I want one of these in every building back home because it take 2 minute to go up 10 floors in any office building I have been in. The whole time she was talking in English to me (as I was the only non Asian person in the elevator) I looked right in her eyes and smiled. And she was blushing so hard that she turned a bright shade of red and kind of turned and tried to hide her face in the elevator after her speech. Yea I still got it.
We got out on ball number two and looked around the little museum they had set up. My father in law mentioned that the helped design all the construction equipment that they used to build the place. I looked out the big windows to see the view of the entire city It was absolutely a beautiful the bund reminded me of a very European city while downtown had the feel of a New York city or Tokyo with many neon signs flashing advertisements for everything from Fuji Camera to Toto toilets yet if you looked out another side you could see an much older part of Shanghai with many more building that looked more traditional in style. I will say shanghai is a city that offers a lot of contrast in a very compact area.
As were we waiting for the elevator to come pick us up there was a small stand that was selling little crystal models of the T.V. tower. As I looked for one the lady tried to sell me a model of the US capitol building. Ok if it wasn’t funny enough that a woman working in a Chinese T.V. tower is trying to sell an American a model of a building in their home country for a price higher than I could buy one here for. Because you know Americans go to other countries to buy souvenirs of things that are in America. I mean why else do we travel abroad? To make matters even funnier they had messed the name up as well. She was trying to sell me a model of “The U.S. parliament building”. Umm no thanks I’ll take the little crystal statue of this place.
We boarded the elevator and the same girl was running it. She turned that same bright shade of red in front of me. The funny part of this was that when we got off she waved and then looked at me and winked. Whoa baby I am already taken here but it’s good to know I can still pull em in.
Another fairy ride across the river and we decided now it was time to eat. My father in law said he knew of a good place to go eat ad we started walking over there. As we did some guy started to walk next to him and tried to convince him to go to some other restaurant. I felt bad for the poor guy as Father in law pretty much ignored him even up to the door of the place we were going to.
It was a nice place and we were seated right away. They handed out the menu and it was all in Chinese. As I looked over it Sku turned to me and said ”don’t worry about what is on there dad is ordering dinner tonight”. No worries right? Well I was a little tired still from the jet lag so I was a little out of it as Sku and her parents talked I didn’t need to pay that much attention as they were all talking in Chinese. The next thing I saw was a Snake being flung onto the table. I’m not talking some little garden snake. No I’m talking about a big round 7 foot long snake. It was in fishnet style sake and it was slithering everywhere. My initial reaction was WTF is this?!?!?!? I jumped back and was thinking “Awe hell no they didn’t bring me here for dinner they brought me here to be dinner for this thing”. Then I started to grab a knife and as I was going in for the kill they took it away. Thank god. I asked Sku what the hell that was about. She told me “they wanted to be sure it was big enough”. “Big enough for what?” I asked “Big enough for the 4 of us” I asked her “what is this? Restaurant and a pet shop? And why would your folks want a snake. Heck I’ll be glad to get them a gerbil or something” she told me “no silly that snake IS dinner”. I asked her if they do this all the time and she told me “well normally they don’t but dad asked to see it before they cooked it”. Gee thanks Dad when you come to America I will; make it a point to make you do a running of the bulls before I cook you that stake on the grill.
Then I took in what I was just told “wait a second I am going to be eating a snake? I might live in Texas now but I am from Peoria IL the only people I ever heard of eating snake was Jesse James, and some rednecks in the trailer park in west Texas and Arizona. There is no way in hell I am eating this” Sku told me “Don’t be rude this kind of thing is expensive here and besides it is supposed to be really good”. I figured I would give this a shot and if it tasted bad I would pick at it and just starve myself until I could get more normal food.
They did the Iron Chef thing with the snake I mean there was snake in everything, Snake soup, Snake dumpling, deep fried Snake, Snake and vegetable stir fry and a snake in some sweet soup desert. Surprisingly it wasn’t too bad at all. I didn’t think you could make that thing taste good.
After dinner we went home and it was bed time. And I was definitely on my guard after that.