Sex guide is 'too explicit' for schools

[Idlethought]

Sex guide is 'too explicit' for schools
Julie Henry, Education Correspondent
(Filed: 12/02/2006)

Parents have demanded the removal from schools of a sex education study guide that gives "shockingly explicit" details to children.

The book, produced by one of the largest education publishers in Britain, Coordination Group Publications, is used by thousands of secondary schools to teach personal, social and health education (PSHE).

All the topics in the 60-page guide, including safer sex and pregnancy, are recommended in national guidelines but the level of detail and the "chatty" style used has brought condemnation from some parents, who claim that it trivialises sex.

In one chapter it says: "There's no accounting for taste. Not everyone likes oral sex. Not everyone likes ham and cheese sarnies, either." It goes on to recommend using cling film to prevent catching sexually transmitted diseases.

It also suggests that pupils engage in "sexual touching, talking dirty face to face or on the phone, even sexy e-mails and text messages" as a "warm-up" to sexual intercourse.

Other comments, including some for example on penis size, are too distasteful to reproduce.

The £4.50 guide, which has sold 60,000 copies and is aimed at 14- to 16-year-olds, derides schoolwork and says "this stuff's far more useful to you (and more relevant) than all the subjects you'll do in your exams".

In a discussion about anal sex, it explains that "some people like it because it stimulates the prostate gland in men, causing sexual pleasure. Some women like it too".

Jacqui Davies, a mother of two teenage boys from Kent, found the guide in her son's bag and has written to the head teacher of the independent school to ask for it to be withdrawn.

"I was absolutely horrified," she said. "I had no idea that this kind of material was being covered and speaking to other parents, neither were they. The matey and flippant style sends such a mixed message. The majority of 14-year-olds are not having sex, so why should they be made to read this stuff?" National guidelines on PHSE, which is taught in most secondary schools, simply say that teenagers should be told about "the health risks of alcohol, tobacco and other drug use, early sexual activity, contraception and pregnancy, different food choices and sunbathing".

Simon Cook, a spokesman for Coordination Group Publications, defended the guide. "It discusses serious issues and gives sensible advice in an accessible style that young people can understand," he said. "Not everyone may appreciate the chatty style, but it helps to demystify the subject."

The guide is one of a number that can be bought by schools which have upset parents and religious groups because of their explicit content. Under the approach of "value-free" sex education, the material emphasises pupils' right to choose, and safe sex, rather than promoting abstinence or emphasising that underage sex is illegal.

Nick Seaton, of the Campaign for Real Education, said: "Most parents will be disgusted that their children are learning about sex from these type of guides. It is demeaning, dumbed-down and should be removed from the classroom."

A new official report calls for sex education to be compulsory for all children in primary as well as secondary school, and that detailed discussion of sex should start at 11. Ministers are considering the advice from the Independent Advisory Group on Sexual Health and the Teenage Pregnancy Group.

Though this is in the UK I think this guide is perfect cause parents gotta face the fact that kids are GOING to have sex before theyre 18. Theres no question about that. Its better that they be formally informed than leave them to their own *cough* devices. At least thats what I think. Thoughts?

[Random]

/me starts investigating where he can obtain a copy of this "guide"
*rings his school*

XD but nah, shows you how messed up the UK can be. I'm sure it's good, but our current PSHE is fine, without a 60 page book on sex. I doubt people would actually learn stuff from it, just look at it and laugh about it. Speaking from experience with the three pages on the matter in my current PSHE book.

[Loc]

It does seem like someone wrote it as a joke, I mean c'mon:

In one chapter it says: "There's no accounting for taste. Not everyone likes oral sex. Not everyone likes ham and cheese sarnies, either." It goes on to recommend using cling film to prevent catching sexually transmitted diseases.

You wouldn't write that for a guide and not laugh. >_<

I can't remember anything like this when I was taught sex education, we were just shown aliens* to put us off ever going near the opposite sex.


*severley mutilated genetalia.

[Neon Pink Shoehorn]

I have two books of mouth and tongue exercises and as they pertain to oral sex, written in much the same style. I mean, how serious can you be about sex?

[pencil_eater_masa]

....god, and then what? the parents have the 'birds&bees' talk?? 10 bucks on that they wont do that... and then the kids are left in the blue. >.> at least they had sex ed....

[MNJetter]

kids are GOING to have sex before theyre 18

Hey, I'm a virgin and I'm 23. :P There are a lot of people my age I know who are virgins, for one reason or another....and a lot of people who aren't. Just because kids have hormones doesn't mean they'll be incapable of controlling themselves.



back to topic....Even if I'm an abnormality in this day and age, just because people are going to do something doesn't mean it needs to be taught in school. I'm not saying the guide itself is bad. It probably makes pretty entertaining and informative material. But aside from the encouraging safe sex bit, is it really something that ought to take up valuable education time? There's "conversational and informal" and then there's "irrelevant." I haven't read the guide, but that article certainly makes it out to be well into the "irrelevant" category. If I were a parent, I would question the book's validity, not because of offensive material, but because most of that (the nonscientific bit) is best learned outside of school.

...even as a teenager, I don't know how comfortable I would have been learning about sex like that from a textbook, no matter how casual it was. School is school, and I'd be weirded out having a subject like that in class.

Teacher: Okay kids, for tomorrow, please read pages 14 through 17 - "Anal Techniques and Cautions."

Can you imagine hearing something like that regularly from some crochety old health teacher?

[MNJetter]

Oh, and a little add-on, I first learned about sex when I was in the first grade of elementary school, from a friend. With peers around, even without the "birds and the bees" talk, it's not like kids are going to be under-informed about the actual workings of sex. My main point above was that I think the choices of safe sex and abstinence ought to be taught in schools - certainly not arguing about the necessity of that - but the other bit is unneeded.

[Random]

...even as a teenager, I don't know how comfortable I would have been learning about sex like that from a textbook, no matter how casual it was. School is school, and I'd be weirded out having a subject like that in class.

Teacher: Okay kids, for tomorrow, please read pages 14 through 17 - "Anal Techniques and Cautions."

Can you imagine hearing something like that regularly from some crochety old health teacher?
Don't come to the UK then, we get that from all the teachers.
Including the mad fucker who watched all the boys shower when we were 10-11.
THEN he teahces us sex ed. Fucking crazy.

[MNJetter]

Yeah, but in the textbooks too?

[General_Admission]

Teacher: Okay kids, for tomorrow, please read pages 14 through 17 - "Anal Techniques and Cautions."

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA X20!!!

BEST. CLASS. EVER! :clap:

=-=-=-=-=

& that's exactly what the kids are going to say about this book.

[Random]

Yeah, but in the textbooks too?

Yup, although not usually as explicit. Pretty much so, though.

[Invisible]

Personally, I would have prefered this type of guide than the stuff I had to put up with. We were basically taken to a room and shown all of the horrible stuff that can come from having sex. Warts, AIDs, etc. How it all looked, how much it hurt, and even the worst part, how they got rid of it (warts). It was horrible. For a year or two, I even thought AIDs was actually caused by having sex - like you could have sex with someone, and too much would cause the both of you to get it.

[MeneerDijk]

Well i honestly think it's kind of sad that they'll shove a booklet under the kids nose and expect them to learn everything they need from that (allthough it's better then nothing at all) I think sex ed. should be given by parents, and if they want to shove it in the schools laps at least do it in a form where kids can direct their questions and opinions at someone they trust.

The sex ed i had at school was useless, the teacher was stuttering and red faced the whole time...and we were like...we know this, come on! I learned a lot from page 341 of the teletext...a sexuologist had a colum there where people could send in questions :)

[kyaa the catlord]

Cling wrap? WTF?

Seriously, that's laughable.

[Kass]

Schools should teach:
Biology
Risks of (sexually transmitted) diseases
Consequences of pregnancy

All of these things are genuine educational issues.

Schools should not teach:
The morality of premarital sex
A how-to for all the different positions and pleasure-inducing activities

These are morality issues and the school has no business usurping the rights of the parents to dictate what moral code their children are raised with.

[Bob]

Lol @ wannabe america

[Jay]

Too explicit, bullshit. EVERY man is going to learn how to play Hide The Meat, EVERY woman is going to learn where the man hides his meat.

When I have kids I'm not going to bother saying "ZOMG TOO EXPLICIT!" and jumping up and down about it (unless they're five and watching full on porno, obviously) because no matter what I do they're going to learn all about sex one day, and I don't want to keep my kids in the dark about sex anyway, because in this day and age you need to know.

[gyoza]

I agree with Kass.

[Kass]

Too explicit, bullshit. EVERY man is going to learn how to play Hide The Meat, EVERY woman is going to learn where the man hides his meat.

When I have kids I'm not going to bother saying "ZOMG TOO EXPLICIT!" and jumping up and down about it (unless they're five and watching full on porno, obviously) because no matter what I do they're going to learn all about sex one day, and I don't want to keep my kids in the dark about sex anyway, because in this day and age you need to know.

Who said anything about keeping kids in the dark? It's about whose right and responsibility it is to teach your child what. If you want to sit down with you kid and a porno and say, "See Johnny, this is how it is done," that is your right. It is NOT the school's right. They teach science, math, reading, writing, health, etc. and they have to teach it to every child.

Reasons why a person might or might not enjoy certain sexual activities is NOT science or health related. How to give a blow job and the joys (or lack thereof) of anal sex do not fall into the school's jurisdiction. That's MY jurisdiction.

[Jay]

Yeah, you're right and I apologise. I just get a tad annoyed when people say things are too explicit or <insert something here> when our kids are still going to learn it one day anyway.

I especially get annoyed with the thumpers that scream 'OMAGAWSH! NIPPLE SLIP! DRUGS! ALCOHOL! VIOLENCE! THE POOR KIDS! SUE SUE SUE!" every minute of the day.

[DesertLily]

Though this is in the UK I think this guide is perfect cause parents gotta face the fact that kids are GOING to have sex before theyre 18. Theres no question about that. Its better that they be formally informed than leave them to their own *cough* devices. At least thats what I think. Thoughts?
Maybe in YOUR town everyone has sex before they're 18. :\ I'm 20 years old, and I'm still a virgin. My two best friends are virgins. Most of my friends are virgins.

But anyway. I actually agree with the parents for once. Sex ed shouldn't be about telling kids sexual techniques and how to do it, it should be telling them about the science of it, and emphasize being safe and waiting till you're ready. From what I've read, the guide doesn't exactly seem to ever mention that sex can be meaningful. It's just kinda like, "Go do it!" and I don't really think that's right, you know?

[Bob]

From what I've read, the guide doesn't exactly seem to ever mention that sex can be meaningful.


It can't be.

[CrazyAce86]

I liked the line about the majority of fourteen-year-olds are not having sex.

:rofl:

Yeah, riiiiiiiight. Where the hell are they getting their information? 'Cause I didn't think it was just in America where this shit happened. I mean, c'mon, about half the girls in my high school's seventh, eighth, and ninth grades had pregnancy scares.

[otro34]

Maybe in YOUR town everyone has sex before they're 18. :\ I'm 20 years old, and I'm still a virgin. My two best friends are virgins. Most of my friends are virgins.



But just because that's your reality doesn't mean its everybody else. I mean, ok, sex should be delayed until the person is mature enough to deal with the responsability sex carries... That is an ideal thought. But, is it a reality? May be for some. But not for all or most.

I think sex should be teach in a direct way. Like Jay said, they will learn it eventually, and with everything happening these days i prefer they learn it in a more guided way... And of course, they should teach everything that comes with sex (not just the cience of it) like: it means something to people, sometimes it isn't just for "fun"... and it's a way to show love for another person... this last one being the most importan, i think...

[Invictus]

Kass FTW.

Ten characters.

[Masa the Masta]

Sex doesn't have to be bad in a controlled environment.

In fact, it's better if sex were not a serious activity than if it was; if sex was serious then you couldn't get any fun out of it.

I think kids will know about sex one way or another. At age 8 my friends and I concluded that sex was making out with a hot girl naked, and peeing on her.

At age 9, we figured it out eventually what sex really was, but not the actual coming part.

At age 11, we found out about cum.

At age 12-13, we firsthand (pun intended) discovered about cum.

After that, I guess we started handing our own pudding out to other members of the opposite sex?


Whatever the case may be, some start early, some start late. I didn't have sex until 18, by choice. I knew I wasn't responsible enough at whatever age before that, as much as I wanted to fuck the next bitch. In the end, it was for the best anyway..High School girls can be retarded sometimes.

I dunno, it just depends on how you'll raise your kids, for those of us who don't have them yet but plan on it. I'll be messed up though; sex won't even be an issue with any of my daughters until 25, but I'll show m'boys porno at 13.

I think when we find out our daughters have had sex, a part of a dad's soul dies.

[otro34]

I dunno, it just depends on how you'll raise your kids, for those of us who don't have them yet but plan on it. I'll be messed up though; sex won't even be an issue with any of my daughters until 25, but I'll show m'boys porno at 13.

I think when we find out our daughters have had sex, a part of a dad's soul dies.


HAHAHA... totally right!!! :P

And i think kind of the same why about my sister. I just DON'T want to know anything. may be i'm too jelous, i don't know :P

I keep asking "WHY GOD, WHY ISN'T SHE A NUN???"

[AssButt.]

I think the greatest fears of the parents' are that their kids are eventually going to figure out that sex is primarily enjoyable. Hey, as long as you're not an idiot (which is what these guides are attempting to -excuse the pun- rectify) and take the right precautions, sex can be great. Probably. Still a virgin, here.