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View Full Version : I Declare War on Hell

Astrick
08-21-2005, 09:11 PM
Deleted.
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Praetorian
08-21-2005, 09:13 PM
But they're immortal and stuff. Let's not. Besides, if we were to conquer Hell, many of us would die. Those that die would go straight to hell because they haven't lived by the right religions' rules. If they go to hell, they'd fight against us. Thus, effectively, there'd be more of them later on in the fight using simple math. For every 0.9999 person they kill, they'd get an additional troop in Hell.
Shamu
08-21-2005, 09:31 PM
But they're immortal and stuff. Let's not. Besides, if we were to conquer Hell, many of us would die. Those that die would go straight to hell because they haven't lived by the right religions' rules. If they go to hell, they'd fight against us. Thus, effectively, there'd be more of them later on in the fight using simple math. For every 0.9999 person they kill, they'd get an additional troop in Hell.

I'm with him. War on Hell is not a good idea.
Jay
08-21-2005, 09:38 PM
Instead let's declare war on war. :mad:
MajorProblem
08-21-2005, 09:39 PM
I'm too lazy. Let's just become neutral and then try to instigate a war between Hell and Heaven, then destroy the exhausted winner.
Jay
08-21-2005, 09:41 PM
I'm too lazy. Let's just become neutral and then try to instigate a war between Hell and Heaven, then destroy the exhausted winner.

I'm with him. ^
MajorProblem
08-21-2005, 09:49 PM
We'll hide in Purgatory
Jay
08-21-2005, 09:49 PM
But we'll be destroyed if we're all in Hell and Heaven attacks!

But if you're still alive when Heaven attacks you WON'T be in Hell.
Jay
08-21-2005, 09:55 PM
But Az is going to Hell. Shouldn't we save him?

But we're all going to Hell too. I damn well know I am.
Shamu
08-21-2005, 10:00 PM
Can we forget about declaring war on Heaven and Hell and delcare war on fire ants? I hate the little shits! And they hurt like hell when they all bite at once! They'll be just as hard to destroy as Hell, but I think we can do it if we get enough bug spray!
Jay
08-21-2005, 10:01 PM
*zombie voice* Kill all fire ants. Kill all fire ants. Kill all fire ants. Kill all fire ants.
MajorProblem
08-21-2005, 10:02 PM
I think we need to pull the troops out of Iraq, call in the National Guard, and equip every soldier in America with bug spray cans and KILL ALL FIRE ANTS. We can get help from NATO
MajorProblem
08-21-2005, 10:15 PM
Better yet, we'll create a new disease that causes mosquitos to hate fire ants and fire ants to hate mosquitos, then we'll destroy the exhausted winner!
MajorProblem
08-21-2005, 10:25 PM
Only one solution: nuke Hell and Heaven.
Myrsilus
08-21-2005, 10:42 PM
Sounds like the Heaven and Hell in Little Nicky for some reason... Somewhat.

I'm neutral here. I fight for myself and in the name of JUSTICE!
Myrsilus
08-21-2005, 10:58 PM
:D Somehow I was reminded of Dynasty Warriors there.

I might just join the war for kicks. Which side should I join?
KujiInRetsu
08-21-2005, 11:54 PM
Admirable sentiments. I hope you intend to siege Hell with some sort of arcane or holy enchantment, otherwise you're just going to be taken down to the 9th circle and ass-raped for eternity. At least that's how Hell is made out to be in most people's minds I've talked to. But there is that caveat-- Hell is whatever your worst nightmare is, multiplied by however much you fear it. So suppose your worst fear is fluffy pink bunnies... something's wrong with you, but at least you'll have no trouble invading Hell.

We'll talk magic weapons another time.
Myrsilus
08-22-2005, 12:06 AM
I fight with the eternal enchantment of bravery and justice! So really it wouldn't matter if I did decide to fight Hell, I'm safe.

But what side are you on exactly?
KujiInRetsu
08-22-2005, 12:24 AM
Well duh, mankind obviously. I don't like seeing souls tortured for eternity, but I also don't like a god who thinks little enough of us that he leaves us for some other region of the universe, never to be seen again since biblical times.

Besides, mankind gets some pretty cool weapons in addition to the godlike arsenal of the arcane. May I point to Devil May Cry's arsenal of weapons and magic and kickass maneuvers, as well as every other demon hunting series that's been in existence?
Myrsilus
08-22-2005, 12:30 AM
I see.

Like the Nightmare Beta thing, Ifrit, Alastor, Sparda, Rebellion, Ebony and Ivory, Beowulf, Yanmato... eh so forth. Yeah I'd love to use some of those. I'd also love to be as skilled as Dante. He jumps high.
KujiInRetsu
08-22-2005, 12:49 AM
So what, are we gonna get regiments going, some sort of command structure? Resourcing operations, manufacturing, weapons experts, anti-demon specialists from the Vatican, stuff like that, we have to be prepared you know.

Note: I call Barrett M82A2 and Jehuty's armblade. Both enhanced against demons, if you must know.
ManiacLove
08-22-2005, 04:52 AM
I'm too lazy. Let's just become neutral and then try to instigate a war between Hell and Heaven, then destroy the exhausted winner.


That didn't work in Dogma =(
Myrsilus
08-22-2005, 05:06 AM
I stick to my amazing ninja arsenal. You could only imagine. Hwah!

I would take Vergil's Yanmato katana, though. Demon-slaying wonder it is... and maybe the Beowulf gauntlets.

Since I fight for justice, I think I may be on Heaven's side... Or am I?
DJEvan
08-22-2005, 05:21 AM
oo, give me Constatine's Dragon Breath scepter!
h2orowe
08-22-2005, 05:41 AM
I declare war on clothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pfalzer
08-22-2005, 02:17 PM
YOU MOTHER FUCKERS BETTER NOT DECLARE WAR ON MY DOMINION KING KONG AIN'T GOT SHIT ON ME. ILL DAMN U ALL DAMN U ALL TO HELL! MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHMUWH MUEGHAAAMUWHGW AHA *cough* oMg *cough* ahaha help meeeee!