So I left Japan...

[Kustom]

Well, I did it. I'm out.

After 15 months and boatloads of stories to tell my grand-kids, I figured that was enought for the time being and decided to come back home. The hardest part was leaving my girlfriend behind, but there wasn't much else we could do and hopefully it's only going to be a few months. Although it involved a hellish 48 hours trip courtesy of Malaysia airlines and Indonesian terrorists (fortunately not face-to-face), I made it back home and am now in the process of job-hunting, which is as pleasurable for me as the process of being poked a rusty nail in the eye, covered with tabasco. And try making a year in Nova look sexy on your resume...

At the time of my departure I figured that I had had it with Japan and welcomed the change, but coming back was unbalancing on many levels. When I went to Japan I expected a lot of changes and I was ready, but I didn't prepare myself to coming back home and finding out that I had changed so much in the meantime...

I'm sure some of you have been through this or will be. How did you react when you came back home? How did Japan change you? I'm interested in hearing your stories, I'll share some of mine as well as they develop.

[Oosutorariajin]

I went on a 6 week military training camp... when i got back i was soooo out of sorts

for eg. as soon as 5:45 came i was wide awake and was getting ready for what ever was coming next. what was worse is that instead of thinking "oh silly me, im at home" and goin back to sleep or doin something recreational i would start freaking out because it was too quiet. imagine 35 days of waking getting dressed as fast as u can so u dont get in shit... run down to get ur name marked off then running as fast as you can to the showers to do the morning 3S's. by the time ur finished its 6.30. THEN u go home and there is not one soul up with you. you lit. freak out.

so i would end up finding work to do.

THE WORST part tho is you got antsy standing round. you think i should be doing something or atleast look like i am doin something... but what?!?!?!?!

that was only training bloody hell.

and i was only in the reserves as a bagpiper... but everyone has to do Kapuka. that nale still sends shivers down my spine.

My point is that that was a full life change for only 35 days you were over in japan for over a year...

[Kustom]

Yep, pretty unsettling I'm sure! I have the same thing, waking up at 4 am before I remember I am not in that time zone anymore... I have been out only once since coming back since I'm always so sleepy... But those are only the physical aspects, it will wear out soon enought.

In Africa, I used to live next to a minefield. About once a week, you would hear an explosion, and then you'd have to listen carefully for screams, to know if an actual person had blown up. Fortunately I never heard any, but to this day I get fully alert for screams whenever I hear a bang...

Adjusting back from Japan is more psychological than anything. While in Japan, I felt like a permanent outsider and I didn't feel myself changing in any way; but coming back here made me feel very self-conscious and a little japanized. I completely freak out in trains and public places: I can't help thinking that somehow, everyone is watching me. I know that I'm just one with the crowd now, but I can't shake these paranoid feelings from the back of my mind...

[Oosutorariajin]

i was telling someone about what others had said about never being accepted because your a gaijin and they said to me "that never happens here (Australia)" and i said it never happens to YOU because YOU are the majority, i am certain that it happens to middle-eastern or asian people here, they are never quite accepted. even worse is when i think about the aboriginies, they belong to this land but they are treated like shit.

it is the one thing that worries me about goin to japan, NEVER being fully accepted no matter how japanized you become but i just think of those Australians who too will never be fully accepted

[koku]

As long as you can get a group of friends to accept you, I can live with it ^^.

[BiZzAr0]

Even though i was only there for a week-and-a-half, when i left japan and came back to america, i realized how primitive america was compared to japan.

[Varia]

I was there for 3 months, going to high school. After I got back, I got depressed (still kind of am). I had a really awesome time in Japan, and then I came back home to my lame, mediocre life as an American. In Japan, I wasn't treated as an outsider in my community. I really loved that, especially because it is nearly impossible to have that happen. Also, the whole going to high school thing there...that was just...awesome.
________
Gong Bongs (http://glassbongs.org/)

[Frankey-eh]

In Japan, I wasn't treated as an outsider in my community. I really loved that, especially because it is nearly impossible to have that happen.

...wait.... are you saying you got treated like an outsider in US?
........What kind of state do YOU live in?

If there's ANYTHING I am thankful for in US, it's the open-mindedness of people here. Kids here will either ignore you because they don't know you, or treat you fair, because there's no reason not to. They will never single you out and pick on you.

Maybe (this is just an hypothesis) in Japan, you were accepted, so you didn't have to strive to have friends. Once you are accepted, people are obligated to stand up for you and do things with you. In US, you have to constantly strive to maintain that friendship. And since you're used to taking friends for granted, you feel like you're singled-out? In US, friends aren't expected to ALWAYS stick to each other... they are given room to expand and meet new friends, or to be alone.

[Varia]

No, I am treated like a normal person here. It was just cool because I got treated like a normal person over there, as well.
________
Louis chevrolet (http://www.chevy-wiki.com/wiki/Louis_Chevrolet)

[raydude]

Varia, why do you say you are leading a lame mediocre life as an American? I could maybe understand that if you were living in the middle of nowhere. But I see you're in San Diego. Are you confusing your life in San Diego as maybe lame and mediocre? If so there are tons of other cities to try before you give up on the US.

[Arvynia]

I think Varia just meant that she had a good experience in Japan because it's new to her and she's new to those people - so of course ppl tend to be welcoming, especially when they don't have that much experiences with the other cultures (this is just speaking civily).

[charrick]

I came back from a year in Japan via the Chicago O'hare airport and when I got there and went through customs, I thought to myself, "My god, Chicagoans are the rudest people I've ever met!" And then it hit me...most Americans were just like that! I also hated the stupid news that focused only on America and terrorism...and although most Japanese TV was bad (like looking at a person in a little box on the corner of the TV screen react to watching the show you're watching), I realized that the stuff over here actually wasn't worth shouting about (though I think American TV is getting better after the height of the "reality" TV craze).

Although in America, I'd befriended people who were interested in Japan, I sort of felt lonely that very few people really understood my experiences. When talking about my trip, some would say, "That's amazing" and such, but I couldn't get into any deep conversations. I couldn't talk in Katakana-English or Japanese-inspired English (for example, almost everyone who's lived in Japan (at least those whom I know) uses "omiyage" instead of "souvenir", "momiji" instead of "fall maple leaves", "sen" instead of "(train) line", and such). People living in Japan have a sort of jargon that others can't understand...and I like it.

I think that's why many people search out these kinds of websites...to be able to relate to others who have shared similar experiences. Anyway, thankfully for me, I'm off to Japan next month for another year to work for Nova...and I'll have friends over there as well!

Just wondering Kustom... Of course I've heard bad things about Nova but I'm truly excited to be able to teach in Japan for a year. Like you said about low expectations being good because then you'll enjoy things more (on the "Second Thoughts..." thread), I don't expect Nova to be a perfect life-long career that will make me rich...just a one-year stint, so with that said, did you enjoy the experience overall (including the fact that it let you live in Japan) and do you think a person like me would?

[Varia]

Varia is a "He" :(

So by the mediocre part, I meant that I don't lead a terribly exciting or fun life here. It's not bad, but it's nothing to be excited about. However in Japan, I made a bunch of new friends, traveled, improved my language skills, and a whole lot of other really awesome stuff. That three months I spent there was better than any year I've spent here.
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Cx650T (http://www.cyclechaos.com/wiki/Honda_CX650T)

[Pierrot le Fou]

When I finally find my way back to the states (this winter) I think I'm going to crap myself. I haven't been in a place that wasn't predominately Asian since, errr, I left for Japan over 2 years ago. I am going to be up shit's creek without a paddle.

[akitaka]

You can always warm up first, and live in San Francisco for a week. I don't know.

[Kustom]

Charrick, I think there is a Nova thread somewhere where I posted too...
I'll tell you, but please let's not hijack the thread (PM me if needed)
But overall, Nova is a shitty no-brainer job that has 2 merits:
1) It will give you a visa and make you some money,
2) It will put you in contact with plenty of different Japanese people you didn't think you'd meet in your wildest dreams/nightmares

One year is enought, believe me. Don't buy all the hype surrounding the 3 year visa, not many people actually get to use and you will loose it if immigration finds out you left nova.
Your experience will vary vastly depending on two factors:
- How cool people are in your branch, especially the trainers (be aware that decent trainers are a dying breed)
- wheither you are full or part-time. Part-time is the way to go.

I also agree that the hardest part when coming back from abroad is trying to share your stories and find that people can't understand and aren't interested anyway. I thought I had so much to tell my friends and family each time I came back, but conversation runs out in about 2 minutes, because no one gets what you're talking about and would rather talk about tonight soccer match...

[Pierrot le Fou]

That is a load of crap Kustom.

The visa is YOURS. It is NOT dependent on employment by the company that granted it. If you came on nova, got the 3 year visa, and quit the first day, you would still have the 3 year visa to use as you pleased, and you CANNOT have it taken away for quitting nova.

They may tell you that, but it's a lie.

[Arkan]

I was there for 3 months, going to high school. After I got back, I got depressed (still kind of am). I had a really awesome time in Japan, and then I came back home to my lame, mediocre life as an American. In Japan, I wasn't treated as an outsider in my community. I really loved that, especially because it is nearly impossible to have that happen. Also, the whole going to high school thing there...that was just...awesome.


Very jelous of you. I envy the experiences and memories you felt and made. I would have loved to spend highschool there. I really don't like highschool, too ocward. I was pushed by my father for great marks and moved every year.

But I'll make my own hopefully. I'm determined to live there for a little while. Get it out of my systems.

[Justin Ellis]

If there's ANYTHING I am thankful for in US, it's the open-mindedness of people here. Kids here will either ignore you because they don't know you, or treat you fair, because there's no reason not to. They will never single you out and pick on you.

Um...

By "US" you do mean, "The United States of America", right? If so, I wonder what sort of place you live in.

Maybe growing up as a world minded atheist in a conservative Christian small town jaded me, but I don't think there's a country in the entire world where groups of children don't single out individuals and torment them. Maybe it's the Patriot Act and whatnot, maybe it's the fact that the American electorate seems to believe that the idea of dudes kissing is a greater threat to the US than the myriad of internation crises looming in the future, but I just don't see present day America a particularly open minded nation.

But I digress.

[Frankey-eh]

Um...

By "US" you do mean, "The United States of America", right? If so, I wonder what sort of place you live in.

Maybe growing up as a world minded atheist in a conservative Christian small town jaded me, but I don't think there's a country in the entire world where groups of children don't single out individuals and torment them. Maybe it's the Patriot Act and whatnot, maybe it's the fact that the American electorate seems to believe that the idea of dudes kissing is a greater threat to the US than the myriad of internation crises looming in the future, but I just don't see present day America a particularly open minded nation.

But I digress.

I suppose I lived in a fairly good neighborhood then. I managed to live as an Asian minority in a white majority town without ANY discrimination.

...otherwise, the discrimination was so mild compare to Japan that I hardly noticed it?

[stsparky]

Would you go back? What are your plans? - Sparky

[Kustom]

That is a load of crap Kustom.

The visa is YOURS. It is NOT dependent on employment by the company that granted it. If you came on nova, got the 3 year visa, and quit the first day, you would still have the 3 year visa to use as you pleased, and you CANNOT have it taken away for quitting nova.

They may tell you that, but it's a lie.


Actually yes you can, it just happened to my colleague who quit a week before me. If you leave Japan with your visa but still unemployed, you cannot get a re-entry permit. His original plan was to slack off in France for a year then come back and find a job, but they didn't let him. Took his gaijin card and canceled his visa. He couldn't do anything about it...

[hereyago]

wow... just wow...

[Kustom]

Would you go back? What are your plans? - Sparky

I'm definitely going back for gf reasons, but only for vacation until I am sure I can find a decent job (not language teaching). This can happen in Tokyo even if you are not completely fluent in Japanese as long as you have the right contacts so I'll do my best, but probably not before a couple of years. I usually don't plan much more in advance than next week so I don't know...

Interesting story about kids being picked on in Japan. My ex-girlfriend had some white hair. She actually got them in junior high, because for a year she was constantly harassed by all the kids at her school. I've seen bad things happen at my junior high school, but kids getting white hair from it, I couldn't believe it. I then swore never to send my kids to a Japanese school...

[soulinhand]

actually, if you quit you have to report it to customs. if you are looking for a job it has to be under the same catergory. They have been becoming more aggressive about the rules of which apply to your visa. you can lose it if you are working illegally with your visa. so in essence they can take you visa. That is why they have all those signs and posters directed to companies to comply with the rules or they will be fined and punished.

[Pierrot le Fou]

Actually yes you can, it just happened to my colleague who quit a week before me. If you leave Japan with your visa but still unemployed, you cannot get a re-entry permit. His original plan was to slack off in France for a year then come back and find a job, but they didn't let him. Took his gaijin card and canceled his visa. He couldn't do anything about it...
Of course he couldn't re-enter. While the visa is not dependent on Nova's continued employment, you need to be employed/have an employer to maintain that visa status, and that job has to be within the same category as your visa applies to.

But, for instance, if I were to quit my current job (JET) and go and find a job teaching at a private high school (same instructor visa) I could leave the country after filling out the forms for the new employment as applies to my visa, and come back on that same visa no problem.

[Jess]

Other than all the physical habits you aquire while you're in Japan (3 years later, and I still bow a lot...though it's minimized now to a quick head bob. :) ), I found the most frustrating thing the total lack of context my family had. My mother visited me for a nice two weeks, but nobody else did. I doubt my father could even deal with a non-Western country. I have my usual silly little anecdote stories for those vaguely interested in my time in Japan, but there are very few I can actually talk to about it...and I have to constantly watch myself to be sure I'm not going into "Internationalization Rant Mode". :) The first sign is the glassy eyes around you. ;)

The biggest thing my time in Japan did for me is help me understand myself. I am an American, and I love America very much - but I feel I love it more...honestly now, because I've seen and experienced something else. There are so many fundamental assumptions about life we all have, as a product of our culture, upbringing, and expectations, and because most everyone else around us has those same assumptions from the time of our birth, we assume these assumptions are fundamental laws of the universe, not a product of our own point of view.

Being exposed to such a completely different culture and set of assumptions about the way the world works in Japan not only exposed me to their point of view, but helped me understand my point of view better - because I realized it was a point of view.

One of the best conversations I've had since returning has been with my cousin's wife Lizzie, who is Brazilian, but moved to Tennessee with Ben when they married. She'd been here for about six months when we had this conversation, and her frustrations about being in a foreign country were bubbling just beneath the surface. Though I was on "home territory", I could understand her, and empathize with her better than anyone else around her because of my time in Japan.

There are other shocks too. It was strange to recognize my automatic assumption that the people around me couldn't understand what I was saying when I spoke full speed English - because now they could, and I realized I'd been speaking a lot to myself without considering what I was saying aloud. :) Adjusting to the roads was bad for two drives as well, then I got back to driving on the right side of the road without having to think about it.

Another big thing for me was I finally was able to lay to rest my feelings about September 11, 2001. I was away in Japan at the time, and my rage, sorrow and frustration was like a festering wound for 9 months...the smallest scratch on the surface would bring these boiling feelings bursting to the surface. I don't know why it took getting back to the States to recover from most of that, but it did. That first anniversary, I wallowed in the memorial services and TV shows, and finally expunged most of the crazy emotions that were whirling around in me.

[stsparky]

You know of Gaijinpot's job listings?
http://www.gaijinpot.com/job_search.php?PHPSESSID=16b6534b08907157cca64ff6d 13303c9&cat=it&position_type=&full_part=&location=-1&keyword=keyword&jid=job+id&action=search

and there's Japanzine -
http://www.japan-zine.com/classifieds.php?regionNo=&catNo=9

Other stuff is regional - but I'm here to help if you need ...

[Kustom]

Hey thanks, I'll look into it.

I didn't leave Japan empty-handed though, and I have a handful of business cards that can be very useful. In the meantime, I still have a lot of Japanese-studying to do...

Ultimately, I think I also need a break for a couple of years. Damnit I'm not even sure, I could end up living in Japan for good, so I have to enjoy my time home while I can...

[Oosutorariajin]

That is a bold leap to make, but がんばって！