Sock Full of Boiled Dimes
10-05-2005, 03:24 PM
I think to myself often too much now and realize that thinking to myself is driving me insane. I'm lost in thought and not able to share any of them to someone who would or might want to listen.
That being said I started to think to myself on Monday that Mondays are only bad because Garfield the cat said so. Who in their right mind listens to reads Garfield anymore. Garfield was only funny the first 3 years it was around then it just started to tell the same jokes over and over again for the next 20 something years.
So I decided that I wasn't going to listen to that dumb cat and actually have a good Monday. I was destined to shove Monday into fates face. Fate incidently is a huge fan of Garfield and is the only reason why Jim Davis isn't dead yet.
So there I am whisking away into my good Monday. I had a good nights rest and I had a nice coffee this morning. Well...I lied...It was a cappacino, but coffee sounded more manlier. I won't lie saying I like coffee because I don't. I hate it and it taste like sweaty monkey testicals thats been dusted with powdered chalk.
So there I was ready to show the world that you can have a good day on Monday and I was ready to prove it. Screw the fates and there all seeing eye and whatnot. They usually have no idea what they are talking about anyway.
I went to college and I was having a good day. People smiled and greeted me and got some nice conversation time with a few attractive females. I had a History test that I did exceptionally well on. It was a great day and it wasn't even noon yet.
Of course fate reared its ugly head and looked down on me saying, "What the hell does this prick think he is doing?" Before you know it I was having one of their weirdest days ever.
I think it all had to begin with my computer class when the weird REALLY happened. I never noticed this befoer, but the large fat man in my class was wearing tights and clingy tight shirts. It was morbidly disturbing and extreamly nausiating for that man to sit in front of me. My focus, I think, stayed on that man for too long. Not before long did the man bend down and look for something in his bag.
I started to choke on my own bile that moment.
My computer class of course sucked regaurdless of how much of a good day I was going to have or not have the computer class was terrible. I also wish to make it my personal goal to destroy anyone who had anything to do with making the tourture box we know and love as Microsoft Excel.
Anyway as soon as that class was over I was ready to just go do something around town. I might want to go pick up a Whopper from Burger King because they were only $1. Sure enough the strange hit me again.
As I was starting to walk to my car in the distance I noticed two people sucking each others faces down as if they were made of noodles. They were really heavy at it and regaurdless of the jeers of the crowd "GET A ROOM!" and "WOO YOU TWO!" they could of cared less. I was grinning for a moment and started to walk over there before I stopped dead in my tracks.
The wonderful two were making out on my car.
This of course had never happened to me before unless the girl was kissing me and I apperently was not on that end of the kiss. I had no idea what to do. I mean yes they were on my porperty and I had every right to hop in and drive off with the making out couple as my hood ordiment, but I didn't. They looked too happy and far be it from me to disturb something like that.
This went on for a good 10 or 15 minutes and my stomach was starting to growl. I really wanted to go and had some hopes of it too, but I was just catching the show and writing down notes.
College teaches at least a thing or two to me.
Just then the guy started to go and they were talking to each other about something. They did a quick peck and started to move to his vehicle. They pecked again and then the making out began again.
There was my chance and I wasn't going to miss this open window. I quickly ran low and jumped into my car heavily speeding away noticing large butt prints on my hood.
I think fate has proved something. I was not to have a good day on Monday. If I were having a good day fate would slam me with wierdness.
Stupid Garfield.
That being said I started to think to myself on Monday that Mondays are only bad because Garfield the cat said so. Who in their right mind listens to reads Garfield anymore. Garfield was only funny the first 3 years it was around then it just started to tell the same jokes over and over again for the next 20 something years.
So I decided that I wasn't going to listen to that dumb cat and actually have a good Monday. I was destined to shove Monday into fates face. Fate incidently is a huge fan of Garfield and is the only reason why Jim Davis isn't dead yet.
So there I am whisking away into my good Monday. I had a good nights rest and I had a nice coffee this morning. Well...I lied...It was a cappacino, but coffee sounded more manlier. I won't lie saying I like coffee because I don't. I hate it and it taste like sweaty monkey testicals thats been dusted with powdered chalk.
So there I was ready to show the world that you can have a good day on Monday and I was ready to prove it. Screw the fates and there all seeing eye and whatnot. They usually have no idea what they are talking about anyway.
I went to college and I was having a good day. People smiled and greeted me and got some nice conversation time with a few attractive females. I had a History test that I did exceptionally well on. It was a great day and it wasn't even noon yet.
Of course fate reared its ugly head and looked down on me saying, "What the hell does this prick think he is doing?" Before you know it I was having one of their weirdest days ever.
I think it all had to begin with my computer class when the weird REALLY happened. I never noticed this befoer, but the large fat man in my class was wearing tights and clingy tight shirts. It was morbidly disturbing and extreamly nausiating for that man to sit in front of me. My focus, I think, stayed on that man for too long. Not before long did the man bend down and look for something in his bag.
I started to choke on my own bile that moment.
My computer class of course sucked regaurdless of how much of a good day I was going to have or not have the computer class was terrible. I also wish to make it my personal goal to destroy anyone who had anything to do with making the tourture box we know and love as Microsoft Excel.
Anyway as soon as that class was over I was ready to just go do something around town. I might want to go pick up a Whopper from Burger King because they were only $1. Sure enough the strange hit me again.
As I was starting to walk to my car in the distance I noticed two people sucking each others faces down as if they were made of noodles. They were really heavy at it and regaurdless of the jeers of the crowd "GET A ROOM!" and "WOO YOU TWO!" they could of cared less. I was grinning for a moment and started to walk over there before I stopped dead in my tracks.
The wonderful two were making out on my car.
This of course had never happened to me before unless the girl was kissing me and I apperently was not on that end of the kiss. I had no idea what to do. I mean yes they were on my porperty and I had every right to hop in and drive off with the making out couple as my hood ordiment, but I didn't. They looked too happy and far be it from me to disturb something like that.
This went on for a good 10 or 15 minutes and my stomach was starting to growl. I really wanted to go and had some hopes of it too, but I was just catching the show and writing down notes.
College teaches at least a thing or two to me.
Just then the guy started to go and they were talking to each other about something. They did a quick peck and started to move to his vehicle. They pecked again and then the making out began again.
There was my chance and I wasn't going to miss this open window. I quickly ran low and jumped into my car heavily speeding away noticing large butt prints on my hood.
I think fate has proved something. I was not to have a good day on Monday. If I were having a good day fate would slam me with wierdness.
Stupid Garfield.