Sakamoto-sensei: Don't you want to be a boy?

[Justin Ellis]

Setting - Japanese class.
Scenario - The teacher, a woman, has passed out cards with information (name, nationality, major, year in school) to the students to assume the roles and make conversation. Because the cards were randomly given out, some boys get girl roles and some girls get boy rules. Pairs of students off students read of their information before the class (ex: Yamada desu. Douzo yoroshiku. Kochira wa Tanka-san...), until we got to one pair:

Girl: I just wonder why I'm always the boy!
Teacher: Don't you want to be a boy?
Girl: No.
Teacher: Oh... I do.

Granted, there are much worse places in the world to be a woman than Japan, but I thought it made for interesting commentary in light of Az's last article.

[Godon]

I have seen girls here in america that want to be men for various reasons. There are of course the ones that just want penises to bother people/things with, then there are ones that have psychological abnormalities, and finally ones that want to be males for the social status. Males all over the world are above women in status generally speaking so I guess the last one make sense. The others just scare me.

[Arctic_Slicer]

There is a small division of people with a mental condition known as Gender Identity Disorder. It is unknown what causes this condition but alot of phychologists belive it develops in early childhood or even possibly before birth. gender is a very integrated thing in a person's life early on and and will almost always be more comfortable assuming roles that fit that gender notwithstanding what they sex happens to be.

[kyaa the catlord]

Welcome to sing-along time with Kyaa.

Penis Envy by Uncle Bonsai

If I had a penis
I'd wear it outside
In cafes and car lots
With pomp and with pride
If I had a penis
I'd pamper it proper
I'd stay in the tub
And use me as a stopper

If I had a penis
I'd take it to parties
Stretch it and stroke it
And shove it at smarties
I'd take it to pet shows
And teach it to stay
I'd stuff it in turkeys
On Thanksgiving Day

I'd rival my buddies
In sports cars and stick shifts
I'd shower my spire
With girlies and gifts
I'd peek around corners
I'd aim at my toilet
I'd poke it at foreigners
I'd soap it and oil it

If I had a penis
I'd run to my mother
Comb out the hair
And compare it to brother
I'd lance her, I'd knight her
My hands would indulge
Pants would seem tighter
And buckle and bulge

A penis to plunder
A penis to push
'Cause one in the hand
Is worth one in the bush
A penis to love me
A penis to share
To pick up and play with
When nobody's there

I'd sit like a boy
I'd straddle the chair
I'd play with my fly
Albeit with care
I'd dip it in chocolate
I'd stick it in sockets
I'd stroll to the movies
With hands deep in pockets

I'd stick in vacuums
On vacant verandahs
Gas guzzling Volvos
And poodles and pandas
In puddles and drainpipes
In doggies and ditches
Pool halls and potholes
And bottles and bitches
Zucchinis and zebras
Tomatoes, tomatoes
In pineapples, pumpkins
And gulches and grottos
In melons and marshmallows
Gloves and gorillas
Slurpies and slippers
Chinooks and chinchillas

A penis to plunder
A penis to push
'Cause one in the hand
Is worth one in the bush
A penis to love me
A penis to share
To pick up and play with
When nobody's there

If I had a penis
I'd climb every mountain
I'd force it on females
I'd pee like a fountain
If I had a penis
I'd still be a girl
But I'd make much more money
And conquer the world.

[NERD]

After meditating upon your behavior, Kyaa, I've reached the decision that your avatar doesn't suit you. Please allow me to suggest two alternate avatars that suits you perfectly.

This http://www.e.kth.se/~strang/blog/uploads/esminister.jpg

or that http://www.grudge-match.com/Images/peewee.gif

[kyaa the catlord]

My genius is always misunderstood. :D

[akitaka]

Artist: King Missile
Song: Detatchable Penis

I woke up this morning with a bad hangover
And my penis was missing again.
This happens all the time.
It's detachable.

[background singing begins: "detachable penis" over and over]

This comes in handy a lot of the time.
I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble,
or I can rent it out, when I don't need it.
But now and then I go to a party, get drunk,
and the next morning I can't for the life of me
remember what I did with it.
First I looked around my apartment, and I couldn't find it.
So I called up the place where the party was,
they hadn't seen it either.
I asked them to check the medicine cabinet
'cause for some reason I leave it there sometimes
But not this time.
So I told them if it pops up to let me know.
I called a few people who were at the party,
but they were no help either.
I was starting to get desperate.
I really don't like being without my penis for too long.
It makes me feel like less of a man,
and I really hate having to sit down every time I take a leak.
After a few hours of searching the house,
and calling everyone I could think of,
I was starting to get very depressed,
so I went to the Kiev, and ate breakfast.
Then, as I walked down Second Avenue towards St. Mark's Place,
where all those people sell used books and other junk on the street,
I saw my penis lying on a blanket
next to a broken toaster oven.
Some guy was selling it.
I had to buy it off him.
He wanted twenty-two bucks, but I talked him down to seventeen.
I took it home, washed it off,
and put it back on. I was happy again. Complete.
People sometimes tell me I should get it permanently attached,
but I don't know.
Even though sometimes it's a pain in the ass,
I like having a detachable penis.

/nods at kyaa

[kyaa the catlord]

Woo! King Missile. Jesus was Way Cool.

[stsparky]

The below is a Megatokyo fan named DJ Izumi (http://mtwiki.ilvantus.net/index.php?title=DJ_Izumi) - before and after thanks to a camera trick ...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v117/Perceptionie/Jamieandashley1.jpg
It's a tad spooky - but I had a friend who was the youngest gender reassignment case at Standford. Girl -> Guy. In the end, you're dealing with how people view themselves. - Sparky